Ceri's diary

AhahahahahahahHahahHahaha

2006-12-29T15:17:00.000Z

Last night was fucking ace!! Proving again that when an irresistible force (us) meets an immovable object (town), carnage is unleashed, planters are visited, hand rails are slid upon, muffs are photographed and a night of fantastic fun is had. Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay.

Was fabulous four at its finest and I'm proud to pinch Rhys's quote that we finally got Toxic 'three years too late' hahaha oh this makes no sense to anyone but a few.

xxx

Christmas aftermath

2006-12-28T16:14:00.000Z

Yeah, I haven't written for a while. In that static way of things, a lot has changed over the past three months.

Now I am not:

- A student
- Interested in conventional further education
- Currently in London

Now I am:

- Seeking meaningful employment (preferably legal and not involving transactions of sex versus money)
- Poorer than ever
- Temping to fill the days and the void in the bank account
- Resolute
- At home in Cardiff for the Christmas holidays

I got for Christmas:

- Hair straighteners
- Money
- Pants! I love pants
- A hangover (too many Stellas)
- Stress of cooking Christmas dinner (it was, in parts, both successful and then not)
- More chocolates than strictly necessary
- Handbags

I did not get for Christmas:

- Santa's telephone number
- World Peace

In the next few weeks I will be:

- Attending a job interview (contain your excitement!)
- Partying my way into 2007 in a preferably low key and non expensive manner
- Going out
- Staying in (bank balance says yes)
- Re evaluating those post-its we stuck on Mel's wall which tell us all the things we want to achieve this year
- Finishing off the Christmas food in the fridge
- Going back to London

Today I:

- Discovered my bed was tantalisingly warm and cosy upon waking in the a.m
- Failed to will myself to leave said bed
- Discovered once more the warm and cosy properties of the bed in the p.m
- Got forced out at 2 pm (excessive noise levels killing the buzz of the lay-in euphoria)
- Went to watch my brother play football
- Cheered a bit when all the other adults did
- Declined drinks in the pub afterwards
- Went home
- Blogged

Tonight I will be:

- Going out with the Cardiff posse
- Drunk, hopefully
- Yay!

Merry Christmas everyone xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

So let's call them monthly posts then shall we?

2006-09-20T00:11:00.000Z

I realise just how little this summer has been blogged in comparison to my last summer when I made it a daily holistic ritual. It was healing, being in St Andrews, always seemingly sunny and hours to myself to just wander, go to the beach, blog and think a lot about where things were going. And get pissed a bit.

So end of summer what's the goss!
New flat on Talgarth Rd in Barons Court, loving it to the max because me and mel found the most amazing random third flatmate ever, Party Pete (phd physics student would you believe?) who has turned out already after only a few days of having lived with us to be a complete angel sent from above to protect mine and mel's sanity and be the official most wicked random flatmate one could ever wish for. Also, the flat's good because it's in the same area and cheap, which in my vernacular is only the most highly connotated word available at your linguistic disposal.

What did I get up to throughout the bulk of this summer? Well, in short, July was the merry month of fucked for a poundness with Mel and Mandy (how many ways can you think to spend only £30 a week? we've probably managed it) Lots of wine in hyde park, blags in holland park, drinking our own booze at the union (shhhh), house get togethers, pasta etc etc but never compromising on 100% mental fun, which is encouraging news cos I can't see myself suddenly becoming rich anytime soon.

August somehow turned itself into resit month, which in itself turned out to be a false economy because I decided to 'pull a Ceri' and drop out of uni.... permanently. And I'd like to tell you that I feel bad or something or that I'm a failure or wa wa wa but actually I've probably never felt more positive in my life. Can I tell you if I'd have had to sit another fucking exam I might've shoved my exam desk up an invigilator's arse and you get sued for that kind of thing for which I DON'T HAVE THE BLOODY MONEY! So another reason to get a job. Innit. My massive and burdenous guilt is simply that it was my parents' money I spent faffing around and taking two years to realise I'm not actually the academic I fancied myself to be, but I'm going to make it up to them. By this, I'm envisaging the holiday home in the Caribbean I have deluded myself into believing I will be able to afford in two years' time, but actually I will just probably be able to afford slightly nicer Christmas presents, that's if I'm not financially arse-fucked by Council Tax before then. Pah. But anyway in August I spent lots of time revising for resit and even forewent SGP festival which, typical, was bloody brilliant, so I guess I characterise the month of August by resit, resit guilt, and dropping out.

September is Tallinn and Being Broke Again month, comprising my one and only thing I managed to save up for this year without having to spend it on rent (holiday and holiday money yey!) and then Being Broke Again because I used all my money on it. And my agency has seemingly deemed me not employable anymore, either that or I'm not listening when they call me all the time to try and offer me fantastic, engaging, rewarding and well paid administrative work. Pah.

Tallinn was a laugh and a half, and good to live out the next chapter of Tallinnsters.
Oh and I want to tell you about some adventurous days I've had in August.

Unfortunately though Tom's just finished cooking (heating up) my

August you're a Bastard

2006-08-15T15:12:00.000Z

Dear Blog,
It's fair to say I am not good to you.
I feel that I am cheating on you every time I go away for weeks and come back just because I'm bored of revision. I know you see this and it hurts you, but I am not a strong enough woman to update you on a regular basis.
I've given us a lot of thought; I want us to work out, I know we can make this better.
I promise to pay you more attention and spend more time with you.
I will make you feel loved.
It was me not you.
It's not that I don't love you.
I hope you never leave me, we have so many memories together.

I am sorry my beloved,
Ceri.

Fucked for a pound! And the Interesting Story about Temping. And a very Lambrini Castle Summer.

2006-07-09T11:43:00.000Z

Pheeeeeeewwwwww.

Fucking rollercoaster, so it's been! I am so excited about this post because simply so much time has passed, and lots of merriness has been had and lots of drink has been consumed but not much money has been spent. Which was nice.

So, my exams. Not entirely unlike the last ones I endeavoured - bloody dreadful, but there you go. Revising thoroughly and doing well would just be too obvious wouldn't it? I'm waiting on some resits, though I know not which ones because the Maths Dept office definitely doesn't have it's arse in any gear whatsoever and can't tell us til the end of this fucking month. Fucking bureaucrats. How do I feel about this all? Honestly? Well, tis a first year in all honesty and I would love nothing more than to just pass it and get on to next year and get stuck into some proper studying. Timescale-wise I can't quite fathom how resit revision is going to come off without a hitch (factoring in full time job and inherent shying away from academic effort), but I'll let you know. Besides, you're only cool if you do resits cos it shows you're not a Keener, alright?

Then there was that bit after exams and it was pleasantly not too fucked up because, really, it was more of a relief than a clear aching to get blasted to buggery at the Union, also other people were still doing exams (how dare they) so I just chilled, drank here and there, and just enjoyed the craic.

Oh, and guess what, I went on a Maths People Night Out. Har har har. You'll be pleased to know that I chatted sufficient quantities of inebriated shite to make them weary of me, too, and that I now feel fully like a Maths Person. Whatever that might be, considering I can't seem to pass any Math exams!

What happened between there and then is a little bit hazy, due in part to my seeming inability at the time to record it faithfully here, but I have it in good confidence from My Memory that it involved some shenanigans of all kinds, and that it was Actually Really Good Fun.

And I was still working at the Cabin at the time. See that? It's called past tense, and we use it when we bail out of a job when we can't be arsed to leave Gay Pride for a shift and they accept our slight indifference towards the task at hand. Ok, not that I was ever going to get their Employee of The Month (if, indeed, they had one), but usually the bare minimum is to turn up for your allocated shifts. Again, too obvious for me, and I hadn't at the time yet finished my ABSOLUTELY LUSH bottle of wine, so it was never going to happen really.

I'm glad I don't work there anymore. Working now in a fantastically normal shift pattern like One of Those Adults You See Off The Telly, I realise just how much easier it all can be when you accept banality and do a nine to five as opposed to working evenings. Basically, I was still holding down the Cabin gig just after exams, and it ever so slightly got in the way of that important task of Having Fun, most of which seems to happen in the Evening (go figure), so aye it was annoying having to miss out on nights out (although Heaven only knows probably a good idea because even though party says yes, funds with me seem to always say no. Not even just no either, but no fucking way and don't even think about it. Humbug.)

Anyway the tips were shit. Nuff said!

Feeling giddy on poverty, I set off with my CV in the general direction of some employment agencies (you know, those bastards who take a cut off every single penny you earn in return for finding you a cushty position in an office you'd never thought of working in yourself), and I landed myself a job quite conveniently straight away. Now, it is my understanding of these places from the recent experiences of friends that they can be extremely slippery and evasive, and love nothing more than giving you the ole Email Your CV Fob Off ('your CV looks great, but my desk is full at the moment, so email it in to me and I'll call you back with the job details'), or even worse, the We Ask You Back For An Appointment Then Seem To Know Nothing About it And Completely Waste Your Time trick, but fortunately for me, I had walked in at a fortuitous point in time, my not-too-shabby typing skills and ability-to-data-entry-like-a-mean-mofo, and their just-popped-up data entry position available, and it was a matched made in job hunting Heaven. If, by 'job hunting' you mean 'needing something badly paid and boring over the summer' and if by 'Heaven' you mean 'Hell', of course.

The job in question was revealed to me partially after a few very mundane typing tests, basic data entry over a period of two months ish. However, they were not at liberty to divulge to me the exact details due to the 'confidential nature' of the job (which, by the way, I have told exactly EVERYBODY about), but after my resigning myself to the position of much boredom, I found out it was logging personal posession details onto a database for a Very Famous Person. Oooh.

Also, the job happened to be the whopping commute of just at the top of our street, so I was very fucking pleased about that.

I'm in that job now, by the way, and as it goes with all new jobs, I really like it. This, of course, I've said about every job I've ever started so I'm going to ignore the fact I'll probably hate it in a week and just revel in the enjoyment of gainful employment. The office is really nice and designery, as you'd expect from someone with a lot of money, and the staff are completely chilled out and friendly, there's plenty of banter to break the monotony of data entry. There is a nifty little kitchen too with more expensive flavoured teas than you could shake a stick at, the occasional strains of Gaydar Radio playing (I'm not joking), a 'sandwich man' who comes round with.. well I'm just patronising you now aren't I, a comfortable desk, good working hours, and a nice normal weekend off thing. Lovely. Actually, I've been told by everyone I would be so thoroughly bored doing data entry, but I've found you can pleasantly switch off and just get yourself into the flow of reading, typing, saving, repeat. Plus the stuff I'm entering makes for fantastic reading. Let's just say it's filthy how much money famous people have!

That assignment goes on til whenever I finish all the files that need to be done, so it's a good initiative to have a good pace because I'm just dreaming of holidays already, as one is always wont to do during summery times.

That's enough about the job!

In amongst all of that, three very cool people moved to London, two just for the summer and one for good. 'For good', that a scarily permanent-sounding thing, but I have to assume it's halfway true if you start a very well paid and intellectual job in the City. That person is Bethan, and she landed on her feet and got a job straight after uni, bypassing the inevitable Starbucks Slog. Good for her, good for Lloyds Bank (to whom she owes countless British Pounds), bad for Reality Calls factor (shit! It's the Real World! It's Grown Up Life! I'm not ready for this!) Well that'd be my reaction anyway, but I'm not the suave and mature one of the two eldest Herbert-MacDougall lineage, haha. Oh, and the other two people who moved here are the fantastic Owens and Gemma, Owens to take her first and maybe last tentative steps in the mighty world of the Investment Bank (I say last because I see her more as a diplomat than a money hungry bastard haha) and Gemma to live with Tim for a bit and make some dollar. Which technically means now that she's living with me, because I moved in with Tom so Betty could live in my flat until she finds her feet here, so that's all really nice.

Actually I have to say at this point that it's all turned out really cushty and fantastic. I had begun to think this having to live in London due to lease-related issues over summer was a bad thing, and although I still always bitch about paying rent for a room I never use (my fault entirely), the whole Summer thing seems to have come together really well... Basically I'm loving it. Loving it loving it loving it, though admittedly I'm really poor (more about that later) and having to always put aside £120 for rent and bills a week is a massive burden for someone as financially scatty as I am (especially hanging out with people with no financial responsibilities who have lots of money to squander... actually I tell a lie it's only Tom really, but he is my boyfriend after all, and he lives the financial dream I aspire to one day achieving- complete and utter devoidness of any responsibility save for to satiate your need for food but more importantly your hunger for beer). Really though, everyone else has Money Issues like me, and it's so lovely to all be in the same boat and enjoy being resourceful (definitely more about that later).

Sorry I went off on a tangent (too many weeks unblogged and I wish to forget none of it and Rhys I know you read this so this is really a lot for you too!) This Summer- I had my doubts but it really has worked out fantastically for me. It seems definitely a case of Everything In It's Right Place (but not as eerie as the Radiohead song). I'm getting on so well with the girls, some of my best friends are in London, my sister, I have a job, I'm healthy and happy, and always busy having fun. I couldn't really ask for more except, perhaps, a few hundred quid for rent, but nothing else. I'm very fortunate I think, even if my negative nature sometimes means I lapse into questioning things like why some people get lucky breaks and others have to slog for the same things. But that was only last week and now I'm really happy.

Here's one thing I discovered after moving my stuff into Tom's flat for the time being. I'm entirely a gippo by nature, and my whole self is governed by this unusual property - behaviour: erratic, flightly; finances: shit, pleasantly questionable; clothes: always, always messy and crap; tendencies: erring inexplicably on the side of transience; aspiration: to never be held in one location by anything, not a single thing. You know how this year, I kind of let my flat mates down by not being there much and generally being Absent Ceri, well since moving into Tom's, I'm here at 28 Clifford House all the time, and barely ever at Tom's. I'm enjoying myself with the girls so much, and we have a lot in common, and we're all free and easy at the moment. Oh I really love this summer feeling, like nothing really matters much except living in this moment and going from one adventure to another. Ahhhh. I think sleeping at the place where I'm supposed to is just too obvious (hey, it's that Too Obvious thing again! I'm so weird), the real fun of life is dossing where I shouldn't be. Even if I'm finding myself always having to go back to Tom's to brush my teeth and change my pants.

He's not here at the moment incidentally, he's on holiday in France. And for me, personally, the great thing is, I feel I've outgrown my odd insecure dependency on him. I can quite comfortably be my own person again and not have to be around Tom all the time. Not that you should accept this as any sign of the condition of our relationship (which is, actually, really great at the moment and I love him more than ever), but simply I realise that everything has it's time and not every moment needs a boyfriend present. Could I really be on my way to true work/life/love balance? Surely not, Ceri!

Wow, this is an epic isn't it? Have I lost you yet?

I suspect this wouldn't be an authentic Ceri posting unless I told you about at least a few nights out (and some days out), so here are the ones I remember:

- Rhys took us to Greenwich and it was marvellous. The scenery by the Thames is amazing, and we climbed the hill to the observatory. Smoking a joint by the Cutty Sark felt just so right, and it it was one of those ventures you label A Really Good Fun Day Out.

- I went home to Cardiff for a few days to look after Mini Herberts while mum and dad were doing the ole Graduation bit with Betty (she got a fucking 2:1!!! Well done Bethan, you're amazing, really you are), and it was like revisiting a scene in a film where everything's just like where you last left it. Oh, the kids are so beautiful, and to my sheer amazement, all the Fabulous Five were there. Please excuse me if my writing becomes slightly giddy here, I've just put on One Thing by Amerie and the oddest thing is I feel like I'm about to slide off this planet with joy, it's odd but I find blogging my good moments euphoric, like a timely reminder than actually Cez it's not all too shabby. I had a really nice time chilling with Mair and Marc, giving lifts to Elin to empower her active social life, seeing the mateys but remaining a sober driver, and revelling in seeing something that isn't a brick wall or other blocks of flats out of my window. Getting off the
trusty 320 bus (the one that on a good day carries about 4 pensioners and at least one moody teen who I can tell hates living in Peterston due to the abysmal transport links), I indulged in pure film montage style Enjoying Coming Home: I frollicked in fields walking the dogs and splashing my feet in a stream, and was like a pig in shit when I found a bicycle in the shed and rode it round and round the garden in the sun, the wind in my hair, feeling ridiculously delirious about the sheer joy of the whole thing. Later, I sat on the picnic table and I don't think I've ever spent so long just enjoying looking at green land, horizons made of hills not brick, and feeling like I could skip for miles and not be flattened by a London Bus. haha. I had to leave to get back to London for a shift at the Cabin which turned out to be an utter false economy anyway, as it was so dead my shift only lasted two hours, and it broke my heart when the bus trundled down the street and Mair and Marc wouldn't let me go and gave me the most massive cwtch of my life. I cried on the bus when I got a call from Mair and she was crying saying she didn't want me to leave. Sometimes I wonder what it does to them seeing me and Bethan just come in and out of their lives every now and again, must be really odd doing the ole 'older sibling' thing. Me and Betty didn't have any of that, but I can imagine it must be really weird sometimes knowing you have sisters living somewhere in a place you can't even imagine, and they turn up sporadically and then piss you off by leaving. A thought occured to me the other day, when Marc is 18 and Mair is 20, I'll be 29 and definitely expected to be a responsible adult role model by society. Imagine that!

- There was Henry's party, which was a funny one. The invite blurb (and by invite I mean, the one Mandy received because she knows him and I actually don't, ho ho) said 'playboy bunnies, dressing up, poker table, obligatory shots on the door', so we gave ourselves hernias trying to knock up half convincing outfits, ignoring the fact that most of our labels read not Prada, but Primark, and you couldn't have a playboy bunny with an arse of such epic proportions as mine. As it transpired, the reality was pleasingly down to earth (perhaps even disappointingly so, considering the biggie that banter had made of the occasion). The 'posh flat' concept which had so readily been bandied around in chat was actually a one bedroom studio affair (they say studio, I say someone realised the space was too 'cosy' to put in any type of wall). All in all though a great night, spent largely milling around the compact space being drunk and having made-for-party conversations about knobs and muslim wives. Incidentally, I forgot to mention I made Mandy wear the Pat Butcher there (a huge 70s vintage faux fur monstrosity my nan sent me for my 20th birthday that actually provides us with a lot of humour!), which was nice.

- Roger and Krystal's birthday celebration took place just after most people had finished their exams, which made it an opportune time to partake of more than a little debauchery. We all met at the Union and it was a really ecclectic crowd, and the night ensuing at Turnmills was nothing short of fabulous, when mine and Tim's KatHats made an appearance and were surprisingly enjoyed by everyone there. There are so many pictures on the MandyCam of various buggered people wearing the hats, but that's what it's all about isn't it? Myself, Tom, Mandy and Tim stayed til the very end, which makes us the winners (haha) and we got the morning tube home in the way that we so love doing where other, more sober people look at us with contempt and wonder. Dibs to Turnmills for giving out free tiptops (apparently known here as ice pops, but I came from Wales and we keep it real, so I know for a fact that's rubbish and they are in fact scientifically named with the genus Frozenus T. Toppus so that's the end of that dispute).

- Oh and there was Liz'z birthday in Cargo. East London is lovely, with a really harty buzzing feel to the nightlife, and I simply adore Cargo and it's archway feel and indoor barbecue area that looks like a greenhouse. There was a fantastic live band which made me feel incredibly jolly, and later Gem and I danced to spunky world music and she taught me some belly dancing. It was one of those nights with a really sparse dance floor so you can really throw yourself around and feel free (to make an arse of yourself); a small Japanese girl came up to me and said she liked my dancing, how cute! Getting home was the typical story of an East-to-West nightbus commute, involving lots of waiting and asking questions to randoms at the bus stop who aren't helpful, but Roger took it upon himself to fuck with the system and break a massive advertising billboard. Climbing it like a little lithe monkey he managed to break down the bottom section which I must say was really impressive and drew the adulation of the watching crowd.

Shit I don't think I even have time to write the past few weeks, Betty just got back and we're going to do some chillaxing. Also Mel's gone to acquisition some Country Manor and we all know where that leads, ladies and gentlemen!

Love you all, more to come tomorrow
x x x x x

the merry month of june.

2006-06-16T16:40:00.000Z

Oh, I've been bad.

Afterthought

2006-05-17T21:08:00.000Z

I want to write something for all of you. About all of you.
It will happen after exams and I think you will like it.

Bye xxx

Exam 5 of 8

2006-05-17T21:03:00.000Z

Beauty - dash through the rain on the way to nowhere, currently signposted 'library'.
& The Beast - today's fucking exam.

Another ordeal tomorrow.

Current total facebook conversations dealing with vital matter of post exam liver suicide - way too fucking many.
Current total of friends indulging in pre & post exam liver suicide as we speak - seems like bloody everyone.

Me - blood concentration 56% proper stuff, 43% pro plus, 1% toxic water bottle plastic residue.

x x x x

Exam 4 of 8

2006-05-17T08:07:00.000Z

An odd morning.

The story

Emerging from dream still half asleep and Tom sat at his desk and me asking him what time it is. what do you mean what time is it, it's half five, he says. doesn't quite click. half five in the morning? yes ceri, he says, and i haven't been able to sleep. sleepy, it doesn't quite compute and i lapse back into the cloud i came from. him, climbing in between the rustling covers and saying words just missing my ears by millimetres. he's explaining why he couldn't sleep and then i find myself berating him, i'm feeling angry for something he did and that he pissed me off. curses tripping off my tongue into the blackness of night. his receptive ear. obnoxious laughter his reply, oh ceri, he says, fuck off whatthefuckareyoutalkingabout. curses more curses, his or mine i don't know. i am angry, and my sleep takes me away from this debate. morning today, i realise that you can dream arguments and still believe them in your waking state. guilt and, god he must've thought i was a right nutter.

Please no more exams.

Exam 1 of 8

2006-05-09T10:50:00.000Z

If i were northern I would probably have described it as 'it were a load of fookin shit' ... basically.

What else have I been up to? I'm going to employ patented Bullet Point Technology here:
1) Lianna had a fantastic BBQ on Saturday which I made an appearance (to be understood in the sense not that I 'grace' soirees with my presence then fuck off, but that I realised drinking would be a folly a few days before an exam, so I reluctantly got moving before all the Drinking Merriment began. Sigh). Oddly enough, after two days of intensely brilliant shine and sweat, it deigned to Absolutely Piss It Down, on the alloted day for the bbq, but with enough testostetone carriers in attendance, there was no way this particular bbq was going to be rained off. And the rain diluted my one glass of wine, so perhaps that was a blessing in disguise?

2) Umm clearly not very fucking much to write about eh ceri.

3) Shit.

Rhys has, to my understanding, booked his music festival ticket yaaaay!! Bloody brilliant.

I should go be constructive now.
x x x x

Summer compilation song number 1

2006-05-06T18:45:00.000Z

A song to transport me away from all of this.

I see double up ahead
Where the riverboat swayed beneath the sun
Is where the river runs red
Like a king who stalks the wings and shoots a dove
And frees an eagle instead
It’s more or less the same as the things that you said
I see trouble up the road
Like the things you found in love are by the way
And like to cheat on your soul
Like the best and worst of thoughts that lose control
Before you lie on your bed
It’s more or less the same as the things that you said

Anyway for all the things you know, tell me why does the river not flow
Anyway for all the things you said, tell me why does the river run red
Anyway for all the things you’ve seen, tell me when will the river run green
And anyway for all the things you know, tell me why does the river not flow

It’s more or less the things you fail to say in your way that’s your trouble
Like a king who stalks the wings and shoots the moon and the stars
And his double.

Oh my, Ocean Colour Scene. Song on repeat on the stereo and on constant loop in my head. Thinking, now there's my summer album. Power chords great lyrics gravelly fantastic voice. That bit at the end with the jingly jangly sounds fading in and out, sound water waves.

And then the song changes and we've got The Day we Caught the Train. Reminds me of holidays with family somewhere I can't quite remember in Britain. You and I should ride the coast and wind up in our favourite coats just miles away. Why does that make me think of those rain macs? They never fitted back in the bag afterwards, and mum called them khagouls. We used to laugh but now in the adult light of day I wonder just where exactly she got that idea from. The line in the song that reminds me of Rhys, He sipped another rum and coke and told a dirty joke. Quite.

I heart the library

2006-04-24T13:48:00.000Z

... not quite.

I'm in a bit of a concentration swing right now, so I'm going to do the good and proper thing and roll with some calculus while my brain's still in it.

So much to tell you vis a vis pigeon nests, chicken cottage lock in, new favourite pub, trip back home to cardiff, holiday booked, music festival chosen, weight gained, exam stress, boredom and a red polka dot dress.

As my concentration lags, expect to hear more from me soon.

Counter strike addiction - I'm still in its full vice like grip.

New addictions springing up all over the place in time for revision. How convenient?

x x x x

Me and my lovely boyfriend

2006-04-02T12:42:00.000Z

Friday night Union you knows it Delia Smith! (some photos anyway, see earlier post for details!)

2006-03-30T13:03:00.000Z

Cabin Fever

2006-03-30T12:40:00.000Z

The stock market may fall
Gravity might become redundant

The question I pose is... when the completely unexpected and entirely shocking happens, something which is so cataclysmically improbable that you could probably put it down to a one-off planetary alignment glitch... then, has the world gone mad?

I got a job.

Furthermore, I enjoy it.

Weeelll.... fuck me indeed. Someone get Hawkings on the phone.
It's at a restaurant called the Cabin in Fulham which serves food to a discerning, largely plummy mouth crowd (well I did say Fulham), mainly couples and braying yarrr families, but altogether a pleasant and warm place. My new hobby has become being as totally fantastic as I can, all in the name of tip acquisition... and I'm getting raaather good at it. In my place, would you want to leave your magnificent table without leaving some mohoney for your fab waitress (because she was so helpful and lovely wasn't she?)... no you wouldn't! And all this keeps me in cash tip heaven where I can finish every shift and buy myself lots of Staff Drinks otherwise known as Asahi (very reasonably priced at £1, and very agreeable with cash tips as payment).

So that's the story of that.
Oh and we had a very drunken and hazy Friday.. one of those ones where strictly remembering every event isn't entirely necessary, save to acknowledge that you can just feel in your bones it was loads of fun.
Dibs to - Zoe Mandy Roger and Alex - we reinstated juggy!! And at it's original source, Weeks Hall, how kitsch! Well, authenticity is everything these days. Some lovely cocktails were invented then just as quickly glugged, never to be remembered again. Although Arbor Mist wine-based cocktail was a firm favourite in all mixes, I tell thee. Iskander was there also, like an ethereal presence in the proceedings, and special celebrity cameo by Tim Ashby.. how very authentic!
Tim Tom Lianna Adam and A Few Others I Don't Remember - for services to the union and wearing fluorescent bunny ears (one of those drunken props you don't quite understand but find yourself sporting later on in the night, as if by magic, as if the God Of Party himself awarded you them for your service). Also I understand you were all bollocksed aswell but you know how it is when you're a little bit more drunk so anyone less drunk seems perfectly able-to-drive sober.
Iskander - for being Iskander and being there!
And finally the Mighty Martin "crusty" Baker!!!!!

MARTIN YOU ARE A GOD AMONGST MEN!!
We were razzing it up like the poshest of drinkers at the bar ordering in rounds of six voddycokes each and pouring them into pint glasses for easing consumption and rambling around with. We drank, we danced and our cups were neeeever empty. We too ended up with bunny years. Baker, should you ever go back to McDonalds and leave my life, this will be your legacy, you rocked on Friday! Also to go down in history with the 100% official funniest drunken composition I've ever witnessed and I will never forget you for it!

Ladies and Gentlemen I leave you with this very same composition, sung along to the chorus of Misteeq's Scandalous:

Iskanderlous
- A Wholly Original Composition by Martin Baker Esq
Iskanderlous, He's had yer mum,
Iskanderlous, got mega-muff,
It's all about Iskander's lust,
But watch out for pubic dandruff.

My life is complete!
xxxx

Easter Carnival

2006-03-28T15:10:00.000Z

Don't worry, I'm good now! No more whingeing about being ill. Updates coming soon!
xxxx

Strepsils for the soul

2006-03-19T13:34:00.000Z

Ill ill ill and can't concentrate on anything.

Runny nose, aching head, heavy eyes.

McWhinge with Fries.

Tests tomorrow.

xxx

Spot the Hat

2006-03-18T18:54:00.000Z

St Patick's Day!

2006-03-18T18:45:00.000Z

And my long overdue homecoming, which was reeeeally really nice, wicked to see the girls again and will def spend more time there in future.
Wanted to join Mands working on campus this evening but I think me and tom have something of a virus, I feel like shit. Started off as a standard manoeuvre hangover, and I happily accepted this as a necessary side effect of the shenanigans of last night, but it's turned back into the nauseous feverish feeling we've both had this week. Vomitting, headaches, sore throat, dizziness, random bouts of narcolepsy... I don't know what the fuck it is but it's not looking good. We've been in bed all day, Tom's still sleeping, but I'm too hot and bothered.
Oh wait I just woke him up with my loud typing. Oops/

Anyway enough of that - last night was wicked!! Union at it's finest with lots of people, much too many drinks, those great Guinness hats (fank yoooou tom!), Mandy (I've missed her!), some foam on the dancefloor I got dragged into, and extreme batteredness on all accounts.

I'll add some photos and I've no idea whether they'll end up at the bottom like they should or whether they'll stubbornly place themselves at the top, as seems to be the case these days!

Wickeeeed xxxx

NOOOOO!!

2006-03-16T20:33:00.000Z

And the drama is over, as quickly as it exploded into existence, with my intellectual opponent folding with the confusing statement that he/she now thinks I'm cool and thanks me for putting kisses at the end of the email.

Your guess is as good as mine!

x x x

YESSSS!

2006-03-16T18:45:00.000Z

Major drama in the Maths department by way of heated email debate, and I've become entangled in it! We're playing it for laughs and I love it!

Thank you Lord (ignore earlier post where I said I hated your religion)!!! Some excitement at last!!!

YAAAAY!!!
x x x

Anadin Extra - to beat pain fast

2006-03-16T00:30:00.000Z

My balls. I don't know which pain this is beating but I'm beginning to feel a curious sensation of disattachment from my physical self, like my pained head is floating around in space, quite unconcerned about the moorings of its neck.

This is a killer headache, make no mistake. But I am the bigger man, and I will kick his arse with over the counter pill shaped solutions, namely this Anadin extra shit - aspirin, paracetamol and caffeine (thrown in just in case I wasn't fully satisfied with the kerazy drugs already in it... gotta get your £1.18's worth haven't you?)

All this and the song that's echoeing defiantly round my head is Babylon Zoo's Spaceman, a possible reference to my painkiller induced state of catatonia?

Past paper(s) attempted today- Calculus
Success achieved - unlikely to have Einstein weary about competition.

Last night I drank lots of Becks, according to the age old proverb that '...A gentleman's choice beer shouldst eternally be dictated by the setting of Speciale Offeres by Ye Olde Food Vendor Somerfielde's, and twixt this method and this method alone'. Crate for 8 quid, you can't argue with that folks. Well you can, but you really would just be arguing to yourself. I had initially the intention of going back to my own flat, thwarted by my inability to be outside of a 5m radius surrounding the Hallowed Fridge containing all the Beers. Woke up this morning feeling like a pig had shat in my head, and not one of those nice pigs either, I'm thinking a boar or a nasty wild hog. Good times though, Jens and Stewart were round and it was Jens that decreed he was 'bored of talking' and there was something about a popularity contest involving who could waste the most free texts (oh we contract types are so spoilt!) so we engaged in a long text message debate covering the more filthy and taboo aspects of conversation, which would probably not go down well with an audience apart from ourselves, including that classic Tom's Mum (sorry Tom!) I haven't giggled so much in ages.

'Hmm altho she may not be a milf im still intrigued bout her unique taste and smell'
'Her taste - like sugared cod. Her smell - like heaven'

x x x x
p.s don't look at me like that! Maybe you had to be there.

Jesus Christ! Allah! L Ron Hubbard!

2006-03-14T18:50:00.002Z

Fucking hell, Everyone! Stop taking religion so seriously!
I can't offer a coherent intellectual debate on the topic, because, honestly, I couldn't give a flying fuck about insulting anyone or putting across my points in an adult way to encourage interracial discussion, but for fuck's sake, when will everyone stop trying to pick fights all the fucking time in the name of this shit or that shit, especially shit I feel that is fundamentally flawed because it cannot even be proved (bloody hell Ceri, inciteful statements here). Hate mail to the usual address.

Chilled out religions - Hinduism [like they care, they're too busy being happy and being nice to all the little animals of the planet], Judaism [lot of complex traditions and rules but overall peaced out to the max, can't imagine anyone blowing their kippah with rage over this or that], Buddhism [life is suffering, we all come back as animals... can you imagine these people getting pissed over anything?]

Need to take a breat have a kitkat religions - Islam [sorry guys but it was a cartoon of your prophet, and you've wasted all this time you could have devoted to useful things bitching about it? Satire rapes everyone, handle it, and enough infidel shit already], Catholicism [I'll use condoms if I want to, and be frigged, a bleeding statue of mary entitled Bloody Mary in South Park is not 'racial bigotry'. It's just your religion is absolute bollocks], Scientology [John Travolta??????? You shit me].

Oh come on, you knew I hated religion already, I got fucked off as Mary in the Sunday school Nativity Play and they gave me the hallowed role of the Holy Donkey (note to self- fuck you church).

So this balls really irked me when I read it -
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/4735216.stm

Points to take away from this news story:
1) "The episode of the US animation, called Bloody Mary, depicts a bleeding statue of the Virgin Mary". Could this mean period bleeding? Either way, you knows it's still gonna be funny.
2) Britain's reaction - "TV station C4 is to air the cartoon earlier than planned in response to the levels of publicity it has generated." Uk sez We're lovin it, thank you very much.
3) "New Zealand's Catholic bishops signed a letter on Sunday urging the country's 500,000 Catholics to boycott C4 and its sister station TV3, which recently apologised for showing the Danish cartoons of the Prophet Muhammad." Fuck off, don't stop them watching good tv too! Go save the world yourself.
4) Catholic Approach To Situation #1 or How to Take Something Too Seriously - ""Making known the extent of our offence might give them pause to consider that press freedom is not a licence to incite intolerance or to promote hated or derision based on religion, race or gender," the letter said."
5) Channel 4 Approach To Situation # 1 or How Not to Put Up With Their Bullshit - "Rick Friesen, head of TV Works, which runs C4, said that if Catholics felt they would be upset by South Park, then they should not watch it."

Oh maybe I need to become a monk.
x x x x x

20 yr old F WLTM mexican food for fun, poss relationship and maybe more.

2006-03-14T14:48:00.000Z

I'm fucking starving!

Rhys, good effort on the blog my friend. Now I know I shouldn't be prone to moments of self doubt, but when you wrote about not having anything worth blogging, it brought about a ponderance which resulted in the conclusion that actually, I really don't either, (if at all you do) bar to tell you about my latest addiction (perhaps I need an official page of itself to document these whims)... I'm addicted to Kick (you know the score, Tesco Red Bull ripoff, enough chemicals to sedate a fully grown cow, Ethipia's entire sugar crops pillaged for 2 litres, fucking nasty but oddly enjoyable). I aim to constantly have some in the fridge 'on ice' available for whenever my heart desire (and perhaps too, whenever my heart doesn't desire, when it's about to collapse in on itself from the strain of beating hammer and tongs because of all the taurine).

Anyway, I've not been up to much recently (what, you could have told me that?) quite majorly due to lack of funds... boo fucking hoo! I've come to accept this inevitable absolute poverty not entirely unlike buddhist monks take 0n board difficulties and burdens, I carry it with me and learn to find enjoyment in this eternal suffering. Also, by my reckoning, it's about bloody time I had a bling drought because otherwise I'd just be pissing it up the wall and buying 'pretty things' I didn't strictly need. So yeh, second term of second first year gets the official title 'Poor but Settled'. (Oh I am trying to make light of this poverty but I would blow you for a twenty so I could buy more Kick) Haha, just kidding.

That thing on Thursday Rhys was talking about in his blog... I'm ashamed to say the free cake caught my eye too, and is, of itself, a perfectly valid, kosher, and maybe even 'good' reason to go. Who can say!

byeeee xxx

Tests and plans

2006-03-13T19:04:00.000Z

Alas! The Calculus was better than I thought

and Geometry worse than I thought.

I'm in a pickle, does this make today a good day or a bad one? Mmmm pickles. I like pickled onion.

Monday night and I'm feeling restless... what else is a girl to do but indulge herself in murder in the name of being a faux terrorist? Counter strike I love you.

St. Patrick's day this Friday, and like every non Irishman in the world, I will be gearing up for the mighty celebrations and looking forward to getting mightily wankered above and beyond the call of national duty. Unlike every actual Irishman, I shall not bemoan the day with all my scorn, in stead, I shall actively seek out the acquisition of one of those fantastically ostentatious Guinness hats (which I hated last year, but am sooo feeling this year), and maybe piss off the bar staff at the union by requesting Guinness, which as you know takes fucking ages to pour. And like every other Irishman on this mighty day, I shall not be expecting a shamrock in the cream at the top. Furry muff.

Byeeee x x x x

Houmous and chips

2006-03-13T10:54:00.000Z

In case you were wondering, it tastes heavenly.

Fifteen minutes til I have to leave the house to partake of some 'exam fun' (if you can imagine me pulling a moody sour face then please do, as it may possibly aid you in a mental image of me sat here knowing I have an exam in an hour. Two even.)

I tried my hardest to revise and calculus I know I'll whizz through but Geometry is spiky and catches me out and terms confuse me (also sometimes I can't imagine triangles, and they look like traffic cones in my mind). That's not too bad though, as I am actually studying conics aswell at the moment. Could be useful, even.

My fifteen minutes of solitary relaxation pre test-stress is whittling away at an alarming rate. I don't know who controls these things, but I'm sure it wouldn't hurt to make it seem more like the quarter hour that it is than barely-enough-time-to-write-one's-important-musings.

Oh I have to depart now.
x x x

Synergy + Wales you Disaappointment! (pt. II)

2006-03-11T15:43:00.000Z

Most amazing night ever last night!!!!ONE!!ELEVEN!!!
Rhys gave us the tip off about something loosely described as 'apparently you should imagine glasto in a club?' somewhere in the region of London Bridge, and being rather curious, Tom and I joined out intrepid club pundit. In what turned out to be one of my favourite club nights in London, Friday night's Synergy at SEOne was utterly wacky, brilliant, fantastical and magical. Headed up by an east London based holistic healing centre, it's a one a month hippy fest with more fun stuff to do than you could shake a (joss) stick at! The official description of the night is here!
We sat down on tie dyed cushions and had a go at Wendalena's (yes that's her name, and if you can imagine anyone who looks more like a Wendalena than this one did, then I'll buy you a big mac) portraiture class. Tricky considering the funky music distraction and how much our model was feeling the groove, but it was an oddly different but enjoyable thing to do in the club, and Rhys's made it onto the wall of fame... ooooh!
I had had a few cheeky vodkas before going but I have something to tell you which you probably won't believe - the only drinks I bought in the club are tea and water! Maybe I should copy and paste that for emphasis...the only drinks I bought in the club are tea and water! Heehee. It was fab, you could take your cuppa and go sit on the floor around a low table and listen to a band playing music on the small world stage, or sit around a massive uv jellyfish (see picture to correllate that I wasn't fucked and seeing things) and drink it and listen to some chillout vibes in the Bingly Bongly room (what a name!)
In one of the large end rooms was a psy trance rave with all uv glowing lights and pretty things and pretty people and people juggling fluorescent things and oddly intriguing music which I've never heard before but really gets your body moving in all sorts of bendy ravey ways.. ahhh. Psy trance, I am definitely now a fan. Either that or it's the perfect cover to do mashed dancing, you decide. Also later on the guys were knackered in the bingly bongly but I had such an urge to dance around expressively like a tree by the uv jellyfish, it was so liberating and nice! I was swiftly moved on by the guys though, most probably to save them from having to watch me dance like a tree in a breeze, but also for some ravey action in the psy trance room.
There was a groovy performance room with cushions scattered everywhere and we saw some top notch entertainments; capoeira, live music, mc's, african drumming circles, and (I've saved the best til last here) the very first girl who came on as a warmup when the club had just opened (now we know why she got a 'prime' slot!) picture if you will a hippy-clad lost soul wearing, amusingly enough, a fishy sarong, dictating self-penned emotive (shite?) poetry, interspersing lines about 'being at one with my sisters, oh sisters I feel how you were persecuted, all those years ago, they thought you were witches' with dippy flute playing... just classic. I invented a dance move, the flute. It's really quite a freeform expressive one, your friend pretends to burn you at the stake and then you do some hopping around like you're just a tad too fucking hot, then someone can do a frenetic flute playing action and then you all laugh... cos you knows it's funny!
Oh fantastic night indeed, I cannot recommend it highly enough! I'm definitely going back next month, but I don't think I'll be taking up professional bindhi, dreads n pot abuse just yet.

I realise I've been quite lazy with details in my last few posts, mainly because I see filling in the gaps as such a major task, it's put me off doing it (isn't that always the way!) So I'm going to bullet point it forward (journalistic skillz notwithstanding). Here goes...
- me and tom have been going out for a year (a year!! commitment!!!) I love him to bits and couldn't be happier with things.
- uni this week has been plodding along as usual. Bit stressed at the moment as I fear tutors might be pissed off with me because of absences. Need to go home, open letters, sort things out. Two tests on Monday. boohoo.
- spent last weekend at Tim and Tom's flat and was quite nice having some alone time.
-Ishbel and Tom came to Imperial Union last friday and despite rock night trying to ruin things for us, we had a really great time.
- Really loved Wednesday night Union this week. Saw so many garden weeksers, has made me determined to organise a reunion! Chatted to Martin, Emma, Gabriel, Shuang and saw loads of others.
- Everyone loves snuff. It's official.
- I never told you about Mandy's bday but I feel I should make a note here cos it was fab. Proper nice do at the HammerSMETH Palais (Mandy's pronounciation not mine!). Loads of people, jokes a plenty. Well worth all of the effort I think and a night to remember. Cardiff crew came down and although I had my mobile nicked (grr) we had a cool afterparty at Johnson (see, I'm on first name terms, haha) with Mike, Jens, beth, Cardiff Crew, Tim n Tom... we stayed up all night chatting and had Woodstock Festival 2006 with tom on electric guitar... wicked.
- My own birthday... concensus has it that it was mutually our most fucked night ever... not good in terms of longevity or memory but a record if ever, so worth remembering. Rhys vomitted in a coridor, Jens got thrown out for lurking near girls toilets, Gemma was sick and lost everyone, I forgot and had to be taken home, everyone else I think stayed on and good for them lol.

That about covers it I think. Oh, Wales deigned to piss me off again by drawing against Shitaly in the six nations 18 all. FFS!
xxx

S.O.S Please Somebody Help Me

2006-03-05T13:27:00.000Z

Song for the week, people -

Rihanna - S.O.S

Listen at your peril, as I promise you will instantly be hooked and then will find yourself unable to lead a normal life whilst you while away your neurotic waking hours, barely surviving between one delicious tasty hit of this song and the next. I'm struggling to get clean, it's difficult when the only thing that ever crosses my conscious mind is how much I want to listen to this song again. Kids, addictive songs will fuck up your life.

Ceri's 'chaving out' playlist, or That Which I Put On For My Listening Pleasure when No one else is here and I Can Download Loads of Obvious Hip Hop and Such Other Shite Without Fear of Persecution:

Aphex twin - Windowlicker (even with that orgasmy noise bit in the middle)
Rihanna - SOS (rehab is for quitters)
Ciara - Goodies (get your hands off my goodies)
Ciara - 1 2 Step (tempting to break out and give that dance move an airing)
Olive - You're not Alone (purged from mine and Jens's throughly genius nineties rave playlist, too good to permanently consign to the annals of dodgy time)
Fiddy, Beyonce & Eminem - Thug Love (rmx) (better than the sum total of its parts suggests, in fact, absolutely fantastic... download)
Sweet female Attitude - Flowers (oh lord open up your heavens and rain down beauty, light and warmth upon my malnutritioned body. And this song. Oh, how it lifts my tired soul!)
Pharrel & Gwen - That Song That I Always Write the Title Wrong but You Know what it Is.
Cornelius - Drop...

Wait, this song needs its own mini paragraph... I stumbled across it quite by accident two years ago. This is what you need to know -
a) The dude responsible for this magnum opus is Cornelius
b) He is Japanese
c) ..Not in a bad way
d) No, I promise it's good!
e) It's a chilled, gorgeous blend of psychedelia, lovely resonanting hums and water noises and some interesting wind section inclusion
f) for fuck's sake people, just trust me on this one ok!!
g) Available for download *ahem*through I Tunes for 79p*

*Or other suitable cheaper arrangement within the boundaries of international copyright law.

God, that was an enjoyable distraction from revision!
x x x x

I want to tell you some more!

2006-03-04T21:37:00.000Z

I'm brimming over with excitement and I don't know why. Some things to spill later upon completion of some decent amount of revision. The more observant of you may be able to fill in the gaps. Or maybe you think I'm a nutty twat that needs to get on with it. haha.

It's been a year! (with whom?)
It's been a week! (going to all of what?)
It's been great! (seeing whom on a Friday?)
It's been two hours! (since I performed which routine human task?)
It's been cheap! (drinking which drink and where?)
It's been voluntarily lonely! (being where by myself and for what reason?)
It's been painful! (I'll give you this one lest you start thinking I'm depressed - I have something in my eye! ahh mere mortal pain)
It's been enouraging! (what, exactly?)

Ah I'm being brief but if you know me you can fill in the gaps and I'll tell you more later but yaaaay I think I'm in riding one of those peak things!

x x x x

Recon - Dynamical Systems at 22 hours Captain. Roger that.

King of the Castle!

2006-03-04T17:48:00.000Z

I've been doing their dishes.
Here's some blurry pancake day pics:

Tell you more later!! xxx

Spackman Challenge and the Maths Social Scene

2006-03-01T21:16:00.000Z

I'm not shitting you either!

Still using up all my communicative time and energy on trying to patch up a massive rift which isn't even mine (although I'm quite good at that at the moment!) Huw and Owens, still not agreeing, still not forgetting this whole business and still both of them right in their own ways and I honestly don't know what to say to them because I know they both have really valid points. It seems like every time I check my inbox there's another update about the whole thing which has seemingly crashed at some sort of stalemate, detente on both sides. I think this is one of those little things that could've been nipped in the bud, that wasn't, that got bigger than it should've, that no one wanted, that no one quite knows how to fix, that we all hate (that I can sympathise with!!)

I've not gone home yet, and it can't be a good thing but I'm beginning to forget about doing it, almost denying I was ever there because surely anything has to be better than going back somewhere that's probably forgotten you by now? Nitch, I'm being dramatic. Tell the truth I've been so busy this week being a good girl (I've been to all my lectures and stayed afterwards to do work) I just haven't had the time. I come home late and it's a toss up between going to my flat (might have to make up some bollocks to get let in, possibly no one around but me) or tim&tom's (somebody there, warm bedroom, my food in the cupboard, my stuff being there) and I guess it's not good for anyone's health but I tend to always just say fuck it, go back to where I left this morning, and onwards the cycle goes. It's not that I don't want to go home, I'm not in the habit of lying to myself in my diary, rather I don't quite know how, if you get me? I've left it so long now it's gotten to be this massive thing in my mind, and it vexes me somewhat because, for once, I just don't have an answer (and those who know me will know.. I almost always have an answer) Oh someone help me I'm beginning to get lost in this. I've never had to deal with anything like this before!

I've made a start - I have a telephone number for the council so I can get my key.

Anyway today was fabulous and I want to tell you all about it but we're going to watch Die Hard now because apparently it is spectacularly good! Or so I have been told.

Brownie points awarded to Tim and Tom for being fabulous and returning from the shop with the following yummy things for me - cheesecake bar, minstrels, cadburys caramel and pizza. God that makes me sound like a fat bitch... I hadn't specifically asked for all of them but how amazing yaaaay. I'm like a kid at Christmas.

Film tiiiime
xxxx

A random cross section of communications

2006-02-27T20:18:00.000Z

Received today

Emails.... from Mandy about the key, from Owens about the dispute with Huw, from Bethan about facebook.

Texts ... from Tom about all the work, from Huw about avoiding dodgy lectures.

Calls ... from Huw about the dispute with Owens.

Bars left on phone battery .... one.

Apparently the only thing 3 didn't consider, battery life. The fuckers. I'm still in love though!

Summary of the day with no punctuation
Took tests took time took snuff to uni for menthol fun got confused got some answers got enough for a pass i think i think i might stay on in the library and then i think i might go home and eat lentil and vegetable soup everyone's here everyone's playing xbox everyone's being busy and i'm being busy with homework that's being busy with me i can't answer lots of it but i think the internet has answers will do a few more hours work then call it quits call it a night and call it bedtime go to bed read a book then up at seven tomorrow i like having this purpose.

First thing's first

2006-02-27T20:16:00.000Z

Today - Homework due in tomorrow.

Tomorrow - And now for something completely different.

Did I mention I love my phone?

2006-02-26T20:35:00.000Z

Wales you disappointment!

2006-02-26T17:37:00.000Z

The Wales Ireland game today, people! I may never live it down. I had to leave halfway through the game lest I started crying like a big baby, blubbering over glories lost and dreams unfulfilled. Didn't help that Tom's a fraction Irish and was more than happy with the result while I wallowed in my misery. I believe this to be perfect karma for the events of yesterday, when the phrase 'rubbed it in' doesn't even begin to describe my actions after England were defeated (yay!) at the hands of the mighty Scotland. Well, at least I can thank whatever for that.

Stresses. Too many and not enough action on my part. Financial mainly. Academically second and thirdly Socially. Which, in all fairness, covers the whole board so you could say I've mightily fucked it up. I have til Friday to get a job because, like the lovely honest person that I am, I lied to my parents and told them I have one and I start next weekend. So at least it's giving me some motivation to do it as quickly as poss (as if the burgeoning absolute poverty wasn't enough of a kick up the arse!) It's been fairly depressing of late not having any money and not going out much, I bloody miss partying you know. I'm too afraid to look at my balance. This can only be good news for my liver though.

Uni. Well, I'm going tomorrow for my exams and studying in t minus 10 minutes. See how it goes.

Here's a merry diversion - wait I've forgotten the joke I was going to write. Well then, no merry diversion! Sorry!

Things will get better soon
xxxx

Sports night delight (minus sporting activity)

2006-02-23T17:41:00.000Z

Can't beat wednesday night at the union for down to earth enjoyment and seeing mateys. Even if you have to emigrate upstairs to avoid the apocalyptically dire cheese on one side and reducing yourself to a puddle of sweat in the other due to unnatural warmth (maybe these scientists exude some kind of knowledgeable deep heat, quite phenomenally inexplicable by modern biological thought?) Who can say.

All I know is I am excited by the thought of Foam Party Friday (yes, I would like to get sweaty and sticky and wet with youuuu baby). And the thought of Turnmills Together Saturday night mofo. All this excitement and no cash to realise the dream. Chh.

(get a job ceri get a job ceri get a job ceri get a job ceri)

What was that?

Still in love with the new phone, I've got free texts and minutes coming out of my arse and it's bloody fantastic! haha. What diction indeed. I keep texting compulsively out of some innate feeling that I simply must use up these texts, lest I waste such a golden opportunity that I've been charged for heavily thusfar. No really, I text people in the same room because, let's face it sweetie, verbal communication is soooo last year. Why have cotton (words that are cheap and cost nothing) when I can have silk (expensive lovely text messages). And even better you can hook up the phone to the pc and transfer all files and lots of ilk like that with the PhoneTools thing but best of all you can type out all your text messages on the PC keyboard and send via comp .... no more length text writing sessions! I feel that the god of verbal diarrhoea has shined upon me on this day.

Enough of that bollocks. Maths Tom has ginger hair and it's fab and I found out today that Mae plays the french horn in an orchestra. My interesting story is 'look! they stamp 'imp gimp' onto your hand at the imperial union! haha!' But it does seem to work with the crowds though so I'll hang on to that one.

I still haven't told you guys about some great nights I've had this term but I tend to penchant towards current affairds sadly. I'm sure no one bar me cares (too true!)

Tim made me smile last night by reminding me of Raiders of the Lost Ark, and I have no idea why I thought that.

Gotta run now, I need foooood. Still not been home, but not due to any dubious reasons. I need to go home and do some laundry though so maybe tonight!! You don't appreciate the joy of clean pants until you run out. That is my sermon today.

Byeee
xxxx

Phonetastic!

2006-02-22T17:30:00.000Z

I got my new phone and I have to say big ups to 3 network, I'm hooked already. All these free minutes and video calling shebang... and you can download porno films for a couple of quid.. wicked! (haha not that I will be doing so, but it's nice to know I can if I want to, personally I prefer spending my allocated £5 a month download allowance on games... I bought a mobile phone version of an army shoot-em-up, weirdness if ever there was weirdness!)

Now begins the massif haul of trying to get back all the numbers I lost, although sitting in the Goose yesterday, one casualty occurred to me - a very nice guy from Australia called Scott who we met at Glastonbury whom I have no other way to contact. He was beyond cool, and I kick myself for not having backups of my numbers. I'm so utterly hungover today (sounds familiar) I've not really made too much of an effort to start giving my number out, but I'll get on it soon.

I'm off to the union later to see the guys, Tim & Tom have already gone and I'm just staying in their flat for a bit eating the food and biding time til this hangover fucks off. In fact, seeing as tho it's some kind of gosforsaken football match tonight (hence the guys fucking off at 5pm to 'nab seats ', i.e drink more) I might just go later, once I've securely missed having to sit and chuck in such comments as 'which game are you watching ref?' and 'you couldn't score in a brothel'. Tim's got money riding on this one (the princely sum of fifteen quid) which gives him at least some motivation to care about this game but personally I couldn't be less frigged if I tried. Sigh. Still, a pint's only £1.25 (if you can see past the fact it's carlsberg, which, yes, I can!) so I might well go and invest a tenner in good times.

I've been staying in with the guys quite a lot recently, in an attempt to save money, and it's been really good times. In fact (don't tell anyone I told you this), I feel like I'm going off booze a bit (no really!), the lack of moderation where drinking's concerned is making me too ill for my own good, and I think I spend far too much lining the pockets of Mr Stella Artois and Sons considering I'm knocking at poverty's door. Sigh.

Once again can I say I bloody love my new phone. It's Grrrrreat (Tony the Tiger endorsement et al).

What else... I need a job. Chh.

I haven't gone back to the flat yet and not really out of any anxiety for whatnot but would you believe me if I said it's just not occurred to me to go back? A lot of my stuff is here so there's never really a pressing need, and when I think of going back something always comes up here to keep me here. I want to go back and see the girls, I bloody miss them. At first, I thought I wanted this whole argument and whatever it is that's bad but my reinvented positive self sees that there's no bloody need for it at all, not on anyone's part, and I don't want to promote misery. I just want to see everyone again and have some jokes. I will definitely go home soon, although I think I am a bit worried that they might not want to see me. Who knows.

Tomorrow I'll fill in some gaps and put up some piccies from last night, they're rather cool. Me and Jens talked for ages about Germany, I'm obsessed with that country. And GrumpyOldFatBitch from the Goose called me and Jens junkies. Which was nice.

Exeunt!
xxxx

Fixing

2006-02-19T19:27:00.000Z

There was some kind of seismic shift in the last week and I've been thinking all sorts of things. Firstly, that what some people said was right, and then, that what I was thinking was right, when I was thinking about things I need to change.

I want to invest all my energy in bringing about all these positive things I can envision, about the people I project them onto. I've felt some dire negativity surrounding me like a cloud and I realised that just as I have the ability with some people to pass on my good mood, so too are my bad ones cloying. It's too burdening to feel constantly at war with myself and it's making me heavy of heart.

I want to fix things and I want to fix me. Rhys, I don't know if you still read this but you were the most right anyone has ever been when we had that drunken talk on the way home from that night out and I had to go piss 3 times and you told me all those things about me I didn't have the guts to admit to myself. The funny thing is, I don't even think I can remember specifically the words you used or the construction of your sentences, but the notion and the nuances have stuck with me.

I have started by fixing my bonds with people, repairing them from wherever they are, upwards. Last week after all the arguments I felt I was losing everyone and losing my sense of me, but after talking with all these people I feel that nothing has truly passed me by and I'm enjoying looking at it from a new perspective and trying to be a better person and fix the things I fucked up. Bloody hell I'm sounding like someone trying to go the Way of the Lord. Don't worry, it's not Jesus for me yet.

I spoke to Gemma, I spoke to Tim and I spoke to the rest of the guys here and I remembered just why it was we were all really good friends in the first place. A lot of all this negativity in my mind came from me and my own insecurities, but I feel so much better about everything now I see it for what it is. For the time being, it's definitely happy families and I'm really liking that, and on my part I will always make an effort and stop being bitchy because I like us as we are, and I like the goings on at 17 Johnson Mansions, especially because it all seems like one big fun soap opera sometimes.

I think I've definitely changed for the better, which is good. (it had to happen sometime non?) I became someone this year I really didn't like and it's just not me anymore. Arguments and grudges seemed like such a good idea because they were at least being true to points of view, but you guys have made me see the value of diplomacy and tact, maybe not entirely upholding integrity of opinion, but for keeping everyone together and because ultimately, trying to be right all the time brings you down, because it's always at someone else's expense.

This is all so wildly introspective, I'm bloody glad no one else reads this! It's nice to think I can write all these silly things in my head and cast them out there for no one else but myself and feel better because of it.

My next hurdle of fixing is things back at the flat. They've sort of gone wayward this term, in some part because of me, and at the very least if I'm no longer liked, I can accept that but I don't want any bad feelings or 'issues' or whatever the fook I would call them if I was being dramatic (which I have a penchant for, all too often, but it's getting boring. I'll leave the big stories to Mel). I liked things as they were last year, and I think I've missed the point that they were different because the whole thing was different. This year has been great in it's own way. Nice to have a flat and a base and all that jazz and something of a home here and a family away from home. I don't think it was supposed to fuck up like this, I don't blame anyone, but I think I know what to do to try and make amends. I'm so busy at the moment with other things I'm sort of giving the place a miss, an awful tack, if you ask me, but me and effort have an inverse relationship - the more there is to be put in, the less likely I am to do it. I just don't know what will face me when I come home or what things are like or what I should say, and I don't know how much I've upset the girls, but I hope it's not too much.

Anyway all this speculation and no cigar and I have two tests tomorrow.

Ciao
ceri xxx
p.s Valentine's day was fantastic, Tom and I both got each other Fossil watches (mine is super duper fantastic jingly amazing) and he bought me some Hotel Chocolat truffles and lovely wine, and we went out for cocktails and a meal at a vegetarian restaurant and I felt like my heart was so happy and content it was going to burst with pride. Pride for us and how far we've come and it's almost been a year now and it still feels like a dream and I love him so so much. And surprise like how the bloody hell have I come to be someone who writes sentences like the previous one... ohhhh dear!

p.p.s my phone was stolen but my new one is on the way finally yesh! Communications! About time too I think, mister Tom's starting to get narked I think with being my secretary and fielding my calls!

p.p.p.s Friday was utterly fantastic. Half price export, four man party, one guitar and us lot all singing along to mmmbop by Hanson. Tom, Jens and Lianna, cheers for a really good night and a fantastic laugh!

No longer a teen...

2006-02-13T10:45:00.000Z

... but still as irresponsible. There's plenty to tell but I have to shift it for a Calculus lecture in ten mins and would you believe me if I told you it's all the same story but with a different pub name and different date on it (what, you would?).

Popstarz this Friday was the absolute fantasticness we have all come to know and love. I want to tell you all about this freaky cowboy-hatted tutu-wearing tranny baby man-with-plastic-tits type, but I think I've just used enough adjectives there I think to cover it.

And then there were the monumental ructions. Apparently I need anger management. Of all the things to say to an angry person to make them more angry. Tut.

Tomorrow is Valentine's Day and I won't be celebrating it.
over and out now sweeties, it is time to learn maths now!!
xxxx

The one with the champagne and Comedy Store

2006-01-21T18:26:00.000Z

My brain is cotton woolly blank today and every time I yawn, I yawn so much I get tears in my eyes and I know this is a hangover.

Last night was fantastic, even if we got more drunk than we needed to be at a comedy club and almost got thrown out. I'm fairly sure the people were funny although everything was a little bit funny last night.

My typing rate is so so slow.

There was something else but i don't remember and I can't be arsed to go back and correct that 'i'

xxxxx

Getting excited

2006-01-06T03:02:00.000Z

I've started thinking about Tallinn already.
I even checked out flights.

Oh god help me
x x x

First post of 2006!

2006-01-05T20:36:00.000Z

My resolution - hate less, love more. Rhys was right when he observed I take agin far too much for my own good and that my life will be ultimately happier if I'm happier about other people. More people shall feel my love this year and hopefully less people shall feel the brunt of my wrath.

So, the good stuff! I'm going to free-prose here, not out of some higher artistic aspiration, simply because there may or may not be quite a bit to write and wouldn't it be burdensome to deliver it verbosely?

Yuch every time I swallow I feel the sting of stomach bile. This, children, is the lesson against heavy all-day binge drinking, which will always always make you eat toilet afterwards.

Christmas was fab, I got a dinky and gorgeous mp3 player. It gives me music on the go and makes me feel like someone in a film walking along spritely to a soundtrack. At least, in my mind it does. You know the type, strutting like their feet don't touch the ground and singing the words (mainly wrongly and always mumbled) much louder than they think they are, to the horror of the forced rush hour tube audience. Bring it on.

Some great nights out this hols (fuck knows where I found the money maybe I've been on the rob whilst I sleep, like insomnia kleptomania or maybe Cardiff now accepts a new currency in bars, the Ceri IOU).

There was that night at Jaks, yes Jumpin Jaks and in my defense we only went there because we saw some people from school and they told us to and we were drunkenly persuasible. Rhys got takenforGranted, I went minge hunting with an old classmate who I really don't know that well called David (he came looking for minge on stage though which was game of him!) and Owens and Anthony got Owanthony'd! It came to kicking out time (2am in cardiff, ah what comedy) and I suddenly realised I was all alone and everyone had fucked off home! So Rhys waited for me and we walked home and talked about things and stuff and everything and me and it was one of the most enlightening conversations I've ever had. I've taken to heart what he said and I hope I'm a better person for it! The next day I went to work with Huw and Rhys at the Leisure Centre (fancy that! unpaid shift!) and they fed me free chips and chocolate and all was well with the world. We bought a 99p B Movie horror DVD thingy afterwards and had a nice evening of pie-ing out, fantastic! The Life of Pie book definitely needs to be written at some point.
That night me and Huw joined Bethan and all her old school friends for some good ole Wednesday night Clwb. What a great evening! In between chugging beer, nicking peoples hats, doing stupid dance moves and raiding the DJ booth demanding some more music, I didst thoroughly enjoy myself, even managing a boogie along to that fucking JCB song I so despise!

[side note I'm just listening to some song on my mp3 player and it's got a lyric about 'sit on my face' crikey! Oh no sorry, actually it's 'I wanna sit on your face'. Silly me].

Our favourite kestrel Tom Kelly came a-visiting before New Years, and together with Rhys and Huw in his trusty steed (Ford Fiesta) we sojourned to Bristol to the house of the fantastic Owens for NEW YEARS EVE yaaaaaay!
Oh it's a massive story and it was drunk and we all had a really good time, so I'll jot the highlights - Huw getting dead wasted before everyone else, very tricky silly string, cheps, taking over the bar, harrassing the DJ, stealing expensive coats, breaking the light fittings, dancing on the chairs, people on the table, dancing under an umbrella on the dancefloor, being the rowdiest people there, claiming I was being harrassed by the guys on the way home to a stranger, doing silly dancing, the DJ being the shitest ever but still good cos we were drunk, being very fucking hungover the next morning and having to do the journey of doom back home to the diff via Burger King for some well needed hangover binjeet. Kong my Whopper.

I think that day was fairly pretty much a write off. We watched a lot of shameless and moaned about how our heads hurt.

Tom and I went to Creation one night this week and it was surprisingly good banter, saw lots and lot of Glantafers, and there was fake snow and dirty dancing ('we were dancing really sordidly to that My Humps song' - Tom. Hahaha)

We went out one night to the pebble beach at the Knap (my idea, I fucking love that beach!) We enjoyed feeding the swans and taunting them so much that half a loaf of stale just wasn't good enough, and we endeavoured to drive out to a shop and get some replen once it'd run out in the form of two perfectly edible new loaves (which we couldn't help munching ourselves as we went). Our plans of supreme lake domination weren't unfounded, and I felt like a triumphant fascist dictator, with swans following us round the lake at our whim pleading with their eyes for our lovely fresh bread. I wanted to feed them bread off a stick like a kebab, but despite our best efforts to the cause, it appears swans only like bread once dipped in the scummy water, and not fresh off a stick, posh cuisine style. Just so you know. We sat on the pebble beach afterwards and threw stones and watched the stars and it was all really lovely.

For Tom's sendoff yesterday, he Huw and I went drinking in town at 3, and Tom left for the Republic of Northern England at 6 and Huw and I kept on glugging right until 8 when we were due to meet the others at gate at 8! All of the fantastic five were there! Fucking brilliant. After having to protest my sober innocence for a bit (ok I was mildly pissed but nothing towards full on drunken autism) we had good drinks and banter and went on to the gay club for all you can drink (note to self - probs not a good idea). And we drank, and danced with poofs and on the podium and I think I might have chatted up a lezzer in the toilet although I couldn't be sure and good jokes was had by all. Comedy of all comedies must be that I called a guy 'a big poof' for stealing my chair. In a gay bar. Oh, and if you're thinking about trying to get on a podium when it's being occupied (hogged) by vain-gay-of-the-century, fucking forget it. He was loving it, and in no hurry to vacate his superior vantage point where he could shake his arse over everyone he liked. Bastard. He fucked off eventually after plenty of nagging by me and I got my chance to show even more people how badly I dance! Me and Gems went back to Huw last night and watched Blair Witch and fell asleep.

But oh god today I felt ill.

Sooo ill.

I've been thinking I've fucking loved this holiday, I've seen so many mates, hate really good craic and amazing nights out and great times and I even enjoyed seeing old schoolmates. And I've seen loads of the fantastic five and everyone was closer than ever. Lovin it to the max.

Oh and the boyf got me amaaazing xmas pressies. Lovin him.

Happy 21st Mandy you sexy biatch! Now go and drink in California and when they ask thee for idea, hold aloft your valid ID and shout triumphantly, 'ahh but now I am 21 and thou shalt kiss my arse yank!'. Or something.

Oooh talk of which I finally got my pink license through today just under 2 years after passing my test and it was such a proud moment! I am officially a proper driver now and it feels sooo good.

Over and out
x x x x
Oh wait there's a picture

The dog ate my butternut squash

2005-12-28T18:05:00.000Z

It did aswell, the bastard!

I just realise xmas and boxing day went and I couldn't be arsed to report, you know the shiz, presents family turkey gadgets ya de da. Was ace though!

Today I'm hungover but that's a story for another time!

wooo x x x

So this is Christmas, Blizzard fun park and that Big Stella Artois hangover

2005-12-24T16:45:00.000Z

The longer you leave it the more you forget just exactly what it was you wanted to write! Here's the shiz

Christmas update
- Tomorrow is Christmas and I hope I get what I asked for although in all honesty I've a feeling that Santa's more clueless about technological gizmos than I am so it probably won't be exactly what I dreamed of. It will be nice to have the family together although a lasting feud with one member may prove to be a strain on the occasion. Nan and Granddad are coming round and I really hope they have a good time.
- Mum has put lots of effort into this Christmas and I feel guilty and lazy. Tomorrow I vow to help with the Christmas dinner. Pigs may fly.
- I think we're going to the pub tonight to drink a lot in honour of father christmas being crucified. Wait that's not it. Ah well.

Homecoming activities update
- Was v. hungover on awful megabus journey homebound (see Last week of uni update). Core components wine and champagne. Considered vomming then decided wisely against. Spent whole journey pondering optimum sitting position to minimise threat of chucking up breakfast.
- Great night out at Molokos with Betty, Rhys and Hwf and have vague memory of harrassing old Physics class-mates. Too much stella to mention but plenty of dancing and, of all things, sniffing bloody poppers. Not mine, of course. Fantastic drum and bass and cheap drinks, ahoy!
- Sitting on pebble beach at midnight with Huw and Gem, throwing stones and chatting about days gone by. Nice.
- Drunken night out ending in face painting in Gatekeeper and sampling the delights of the new Tiger Tiger with Gem and Rhi. Pleasantly surprised to discover was not too upmarket (this is Cardiff) and had nice atmos, excepting all sleazy older men. Got obnoxious twat ejected for drinking my beer.
- Hanging out at Gem's house and relinquishing my post as official Aberystwyth Crescent dosser.
- Hanging out at Huw's house and relinquishing my post as official Heath Park Avenue dosser.
- Took kids to fantastic fairground-within-massive-stadium-with-fake-snow effort, going by the name of Millennium Stadium's Blizzard Fun Park. Had good craic on rides and plenty of candy floss but definitely not beneficial for Stella induced hangover. Took to bed at 9pm to curl up and die with arsenal of ibuprofen.
- Went shopping in town with Mair and bought lots of cute stuff I couldn't afford. Shameful defeat in pizza eating at Pizza Hut at the hands of a ten year old. Who even went on to cane the ice cream factory after thrashing my pitiful ass. Shame.
- Drove 20 mins in car with Elin to satisfy sugar cravings.

Last week of uni update -
- Very pissed up night out at Bar Rumba ignoring inevitable 8am megabus the next day. Drank two bottles of wine at Tim and Tom's and then some more wine at the bar and then some champagne and then bluuurrrrrr. Woke with banging headache, bruise on forehead and dreadful feeling I'd made an arse of myself. Confirmed by Mandy who told stories of me laying on the floor of the flat crying and refusing to move. Oops.
- Um
- I'm sure I did something
- I just can't remember

Ah well, Merry Christmas everyone!
Love ceri x x x

p.s I miss you all

White Russians

2005-12-14T21:20:00.000Z

Ah shit, the blog. And in all the excitement I had quite forgotten all about this pseudo reportage. Christmas cometh soon and with it my chance to see family and friends, and na'ery a mince pie shall cross the threshold of my lips, for I have vowed most certain weight loss this most festive of all festive seasons. However, I will ration for myself daily at least one Yuletide alcoholic concoction, as are ever loth to appear at Christmastime. So come one come all ye three wise men - Snowballs, White Russians and Bacardi cokes.

Leave the Buck's Fizz at the door, bitte.

More later! x x x

Turbo Shandy

2005-12-07T16:44:00.000Z

Hola!
Last Friday was quite simply fantastic, and the weekend thereafter spent living off the hangover! It was the End's tenth anniversary celebrations (I still have the writstband on, sigh) and Gemma, Lianna, Tim, Tom, Jens, Stewart and I went in very high spirits (courtesy of good ole fashioned excitement and a bit of White Ace thrown in). I went dressed as some sort of flower girl, an outfit myself and Rhys had dreamt up during a day shopping in Fulham. Lots of garish flowers in my hair, some Hawaiian lei (which, if you were wondering, came from a fantastic thing I found in a charity shop called 'Learn Hula Dancing' [complete with some hula music to get you going!!]), oh and I had a new, very see thru but quite cute dress which cost me virtually nothing (a stolen item? oh no, for it cameth from the joyous store Primark with God's own speed to deliver! Hail!). I made everyone wear a flower or a garland or some sort of decortation and we all looked very gay (in the old sense of course!) I can't summarise a great night into a few sentences (as you've probably already guessed!) but we danced all night, the music was fantastic (DJ Marky and Laurent Garnier), and everyone was really enjoying it. We stayed til the end and got home at 8am ish totally knackered, and the late bedtime was a pattern to define the rest of my weekend. 'Limbo' is too weak a word; between lack of sleep and feeling exhausted and not leaving the house, the whole weekend whiled away and I was left with a very shady Sunday and some tests the next day (urgh). I did try to revise (honestly!) but I fainted in the library, and all hope was lost (oh the melodrama!!) To be honest I wasn't in much of a mood to revise anyway so the fainting was like a blessing (or rather, an excuse not to do much more work!)
Tom came round and bought some food and juice for me to make me feel better. Personally, I think he has a feeder fetish and I'm his next target, but there you go.

On Monday I came back from my tests (one was good, one was bad, this always seems to happen!) and I don't really remember what happened. Oh yeah, Tom and I went to Nando's for food (too lazy to cook, boo hoo students have it so difficult). Never been to a Nando's before but I really liked the laid back do-it-yourself-cos-its-too-expensive-for-us-to-hire-staff-to-do-it-for-you attitude and they had the most gorgeous sauces, which of course I spent time moaning about because it simply would not do that it was simply too hot for my delicate palate to consume! I had a mini freakout aswell over my burger, being convinces as I was that because we were in a chicken restaurant, the chefs would have some sort of vocation related vendetta against those not willing to eat their fine meat (a notion not entirely appeased by the heading to the miniscule vegetarian section of the menu - 'vegetarian food. we love vegetarians. all our chickens are vegetarians'. The bastards.)

Later on we received quite a surprise phonecall from Mike Dean Music Scene (see Praguesters for more details!). We went drinking, we got booze from 24 hour Tesco, went back to ours, debated vigorously the working pros and cons of ID cards, had a fantastically inspired idea for a log cabin New Year's (which somehow not one of us can now shake, so real has it become in its conception) and I think we watched family guy then slept. I'm sure other stuff happened but let's face it, I'm quite dull in my rhetoric and life is so so short these days.

Last night we went to Hammersmith and drank. What a fucking surprise.

Bye! x x x

An hour later

2005-12-06T04:25:00.000Z

And a bit drunker.

A postscript to all that, I am in love with the world.

I cannot wait for Christmas and I've strong suspicions that I am part of the most amazing family in the world. Mum and Dad, I will probably never tell you this but the biggest testament to you both is that if I ever had kids, I would want to be exactly like you as a parent. I'm drunk and this is easier to say, but I'm never not overwhelmed by how much you've done for us and how much you love us and how amazing you are in every way I can think of.

I want to write more but I know it wouldn't mean anything because I'm drunk. I'm going to write this to you in a letter when I'm sober and hide it somewhere in my room and maybe one day you will find it when I'm not around. I want you to know all of this so much but I can never find a way of making it sound sincere and not contrived.

You both are perfect. Absolutely perfect.
Oh I am full of love right now and it all sounds so shit. I love you, I love you, I love you.

Over and out x x x

Oh what am I doing?

2005-12-06T03:05:00.000Z

I wanted to tell you stuff, things I've been doing and things I've been thinking and stuff I'm planning and all that but now I am too drunk and it simply won't work.
I'm still here, the weekend came and went, I fainted in the library, dressed in flowers and ate pineapple.
Mike is here and I'm drinking cider mixed with Kick and I'm enjoying it.
We're talking about a log cabin at New Year's Eve and it's the most tantalising plan ever.
The guys are in the kitchen talking excitedly.
I just sneezed three times in a row. I wish it were lucky!

Bye! x x x

Oh alcohol!

2005-12-01T17:34:00.000Z

Tuesday night pictures -

http://amandhi.blogspot.com/2005/11/goose-and-pervie-bar-staff-but-free.html

(I rinsed it from mandy's site cos I am so so lazy! NB - Roger is the most absurd drag queen I have ever seen).

Last night was a Union wednesday, alcohol, jokes, shisha, stupid dancing, naff simon jokes, broken toilets, broken hearts and tesco 24 hour binjeet in equal proportions.

By the way! Our 24 hr tesco now has a 24 hour booze license.

a 24 hour booze license

24 hour booze license!!!!!!!!!!!!

just had to get that out there. oh god I am weeing myself completely. Imagine the ramifications! God bless Labour government etc etc

Over and out
x x x x

Piccies dontcha know

2005-11-27T18:03:00.000Z

Here's some pics from that Thursday night at the Richmond which was absolutely wiiicked. I think we were drunk too, but I'm not in a position to confirm or deny.
Lovin that dress btw mands! hope you all love the pics
x x x

I can't wait for the (next) weekend to begin

2005-11-27T18:00:00.000Z

It was a good weekend and now I'm back down to earth with a bump.

Popstarz on friday night was fabulous, more booze, booty and laughing gas than you could shake a stick at. Tom and I got drunk and lost in the club and we didn't sleep til 8.

Mezzing out yesterday was well needed and drinking myself silly with sunny d was so so lovely.

niiight x

FUCK!

2005-11-26T05:30:00.000Z

im fucked!!!!!
fuuuucked i tell thee
shit tomorrow is gonna be fun
im fucking fucked hahaha
oh dear cez you silly billy

tom says- i had a very good time at popstarz prrsshhhh its assured me that gay clubs are a v good night out a lot better than i predicted hmm ummmm that's all folks wait and it is more than complimented when guys wanna bum you

ceri - what??

tom - and... a guy called richard tried to snog me it was flattering but there is only 1 for me wait dont write that ... also his friend emily tried to snog me

ceri - she tried to snog me too!

tom - it made me believe that a gay club is a good night out even though i felt awkward b4 going i hope youre makin this into decent english

ceri - (im not haha)

tom - thank u rhys for introducin me to the gay scene which i believe to b a load of fun and prrrshhhh god bless u if there is a god!

ceri - rhys i wanna have ur babies (im chain smokin like a fag haha)

tom - yeh she's skankin all my fags

ceri - u knows u luv me tom!!! give me a light! my fag is unlit :-(

tom - the lighter's there

ceri - oops haha

tom - ohhh nicotine

ceri- i second that hahah i love this blog im buggered

tom - im lovin lucozade too cos it says 0n top of the bottle brain and body energy which is what i need now

ceri - indeed! also some sleep could b good?

tom - sleep may not b 2 easy right now let's listen to music n smoke and where's ur punctuation ceri

ceri - cider stole it. fucker#

u heard it here 1st!!!
x x x x
love from ceri n tom 2005!

Fat chicks in party hats.com

2005-11-25T17:21:00.000Z

Funny website that, not entirely politically correct but an interesting subversion of the English language.

A lot to report since last post so will, in no chronical order, or maybe I will if my memory works well, jot them for you in easy to digest bitesize points (don't sue me BBC bitesize!)

- re-experienced the love for the Richmond on a Thursday night, cheapness a plenty and within walking distance and loads of friendly people there. Mandy and Rhys made my evening with crazy dressing up and taking loads of silly but really cool pictures. We drank beer and danced with guys who were more silly than we were. I think we drank Lambrini and it was so cold outside the Lambrini was chilled (my mini skirted legs did not see the positives though).

- Elena's birthday on Friday and we went to a shisha cafe then to Fabric. Despite an early exit due to the most inexplicable vomit episode of my life, I really got bitten by the beats and the music was so fine. (You're wondering about the vomit yeah? I was really thirsty and drank a litre of water and vomited it straight back up, completely neat, in the middle of the club. Put me off my dancing vibe completely!). The walk home was somewhat magical and enjoyable and eventful in turns. We waited half an hour for a bus on a road that was ostentatiously closed off with traffic cones right ahead of us, completely devoid of traffic and conspicuously closed and not reachable by bus. A smug tramp pointed it out to the amassed crowd and how surreal it was to laugh at ourselves stood there being stupid. I was buzzing all night and felt really happy and glad to be lost in urban jungle central london, because to be lost was to be there in that moment with him and I enjoyed it.

- I hung out with Rhys during the evening on Saturday and we did some more pie rounders, true to form and watched some family guy. I realised, Rhys is like my family away from Wales in London. In the evening I drank some wine then met up with Tom and the guys at Belushi's bar in Fulham, a rather quite good bar once I'd gotten over being thoroughly pissed at queueing half an hour to get in then paying £5 (and boy did I let him know about it). Sorry Tom, I had a good time you know, it was worth going. We danced then walked home in the bitter cold but the beer took the edge off it and it was actually quite nice.

- Sunday brought another undiscovered gem of Fulham, namely TGI Fridays and the cocktail club 5-8pm 2-4-1 cocktails. Oh, and they do maaassif cocktails, something like a fish bowl but thankfully no algae or living creatures within (but lots of booze, which is what we go to school for). We spent a really nice evening eating a meal, chilling and being 'a couple'.

- Monday and I spent some really nice quality time with Gems. I've missed her so much recently and it was nice to just sit in the flat and watch Extras and tentatively eat something I'd prepared which could be loosely construed as food. Tom and I felt the need to share the cocktail club love with Tim and Gem, so we took them there and we all enjoyed loads of cocktails and some food and it felt just really nice, like something we were definitely all supposed to be doing. Later we got home and watched Rosemary's baby and it is a fucking good film I tell thee, gets off to somewhat of a slow start but very very eerie once it gets into the swing!

-Tuesday. Shit I can't remember! Wait I just conferred, I remember now! I spent a lovely evening in the company of some of the Barrie House massif, me and mandy met roger and james in their local and it's quite a funky pub, it had some live music and a really nice atmosphere, ooh and a candle lit table (Roger kept almost accidentally drinking the candle). I went back to the guys' flat after for a bit of playstation I was too drunk to understand, and simon wore his party boy thong and I sniffed it. I don't know why. I went to see Lianna, Tom and Stewart after and they were pleasantly drunk and Tom played us songs on his guitar and Stewart sang Incubus and we were playing around with a torch in the dark. A drunken injoke was spawned, something to do with Eddie Bo, but way too sad to commit to permanent media so I'll leave it at that, but we did write Eddie all over the flat. Oh dearie me.

- Wednesday, oh I was drunk again (shit, this is getting predictable?) Cheapskates. nuff said.
I don't remember getting home but I remember drinking drinks that tasted of paint stripper and it all becoming so tasty after a while. loads of people were out, all of the Barrie House boys, Tim, Tom, Jens and Stewart. I really enjoyed myself and it was good to get plastered in the good ole fashioned way. I tell thee though the fucking hangover was not good. (see Thursday)

- Hangover hangover hangover. yeuch. Hail stones on the way back from tescos. Watching the godfather trilogy trying to numb my injured brain. Bleugh.

- Today. I'm going to a gay club and I'm bringing everyone down with me yaaaay! I have cider in the fridge and I'm not afraid to drink it.

Cya soon my friend
x x x x

The pop music charter

2005-11-17T02:33:00.000Z

http://www.popjustice.co.uk/features/themodern/

so, so true!

Union was great this evening, and we swagged lots of food from the cupboards of students in Beit hall by breaking and entering.
If I'm going to hell, at least I'm not going there hungry.

Sucky sucky five dollar
x x x x

Boozeday Tuesday

2005-11-15T21:24:00.000Z

I tried staying in on a Tuesday night, I really did!!
But my hands had that tingling feeling and I couldn't keep my arse still on my seat and everything and everyone indoors-related was boring the pants off me and suddenly I understood.
It was only a matter of time before Mandy mentioned Gardening Club and that was it. That was it!

We're meeting in half an hour at the tube station to embark for a quiet drink.
Heehee.
x x x x

Mojito Monday

2005-11-15T12:17:00.000Z

Plenty of mojitos and a good smoke afterwards.
Lots of drunk medics but all bearable.
Chips and owt moist.

All in all, a fine Monday night.
x x x x x

Testes not tests

2005-11-14T16:30:00.000Z

I prefer testes to tests, as evidenced by today's awfully dire tests. Monday mornings bleugh.

Tom said something about going out and drinking Mojitos tonight.

My mind said something about staying in and doing some work for tomorrow.

Decisions decisions
x x x x x

Tourette's guy

2005-11-13T21:39:00.000Z

Arrived at London this evening and was really nice to see the girls at the castle again and the guys at Johnson. I have a duty to return home at 11 and get mashed but this appears to collide with my best interests which involve studying for my test tomorrow. There's a compromise between the two, I'm sure, and i will attempt to find it once I get off this bloody thing.

Right, exeunt
x

Alcohol Maths - my amazing findings.

2005-11-12T23:11:00.000Z

Alcohol value for money project - my scientific findings.
- a report by Ceri Herbert, booze mathematician.

Per pound here's how many units you're getting, as calculated by myself using approximate price and volume (being able to do this leads me to believe I know just a little too much about booze but there you go).

Offie prices

Cider, Strongbow (£3 for 3 litres, 5.3%). Units per pound - 5.3.
Cider, Summerdown dry cider (£1.50 for 2 Litres, 5.5%). Units per pound - 7.3
Lambrini (£2.10 for 1.5 Litres, 7.5%). Units per pound - 5.4
Cheapest wine (£2 for 0.75 Litres, 12.5%). Units per pound - 4.69
Not so cheap wine (£3 for 0.75 Litres, 13%). Units per pound - 3.25
Grolsch (8 cans for £6, 5%). Units per pound - 3.3
Cider, White Ace (£2 for 2 Litres, 7.5%). Units per pound - 7.5
Bottle of vodka, (£11 for 1 Litre, 40%). Units per pound - 3.6

What do our findings show? Always go for cider, the cheaper and nastier the better because let's face hard facts, it is getting you more plastered for less cash. Wine - don't pay anything above £3 because then your units per pound index is way low and completely off the scale. Lambrini - not as bad as we thought it would be. Drink up but only if you buy it at below £1.05 for 750ml otherwise it's too expensive for what it is. Grolsch - what a let down. Strong lager though it is I'm not impressed by its bad value for money. Vodka - I didn't expect it to be up thee with beer but my main consideration is there's a bloody lot of it to drink and you need mixer so consider your costs carefully.

My next project, examining bar prices for drinks and how this affects what we should be buying.

Three friends I missed, good loan news, politically incorrect pub crawl and other bits and bobs.

2005-11-12T22:17:00.000Z

Three people I wanted to see this week in Cardiff and I missed them all. S was in a club and my mobile died, B and I were supposed to meet at half ten and my train was delayed and I got there and she wasn't there but it turned out she'd gotten there just a bit later than I had and neither of us had phones to phone each other. And I have no money to go and see W even though I'm totally free this evening with a fully charged phone. Life's a buggery sometimes.

One person I did manage to successfully collide with this week is Rhys, oh and Owens. Great to see her again looking gorgeous as ever and leading the way in our alcohol inspired people-baiting game in the club. Rhys and I made the most of our maximised potential to drink cheaply whilst back in an actually-not-too-expensive capital city (that's Wales for you).
Nights of note -

Wednesday night clwb, three floors of good vibes and young drunks (thumbs up) and £1 bottles of beer (or some dodge looking alcopop if you are so inclined). I made the most of the fact that all the bar staff spoke Welsh and ordered my drinks in the lovely language, but really you don't get much convo for your pound (one bottle of Fosters) - "un Fosters, plis". Ah well. I'd like to think they like the Welshies out there but in all fairness I probably just sounded like a Valleys girl slurring her words post-wkd-blue. We evolved on an old drunken shenanigan and went round all night snorting invisible lines off people. When a smelly stolen tramps hat was placed upon your head, so fell it to you to attempt a snorting on a target of your choice, the more inaccessible the area you dare a snort from the better. Top points for Owens who would, with the tact of someone not quite in their soberest hour, incessantly always go for the crotch, girlfriend of besnorted guy present or not. The biggest surprise of the night for all of us was we actually managed to get people joining in who'd seen us at our naff antics and wanted to have a go themselves. The mind boggles.
Oh and I forgot to mention I jumped in a massive cardboard box and got pushed out sideways into a puddle of steaming fresh piss. This is how we do it, ladies and gentleman. But don't blame the booze blame the game... or something.

One night of this week was devoted to good old co-op therapy and activities of the staying-at-home-chilling-drinking-fannying-around-on-gaydar-for-laughs order. Rhys and I honed our talents at 'pie rounders', a complex and traditional sport involving fast paced gluttony in two kitchen locations (e.g the worksurface and the kitchen table), swapping continually between the two posts of fatty food joy so as to get variety but without stopping the noshing. Something about eating double cream neat and full on chunks of parmesan cheese but I'm not entirely sure. I blame White Lightning.

Last night I went with all the family to the Millennium Stadium to see the Wales Fiji game and I have to say the stadium never fails to impress. Which isn't a phrase you'd heard used about Wales's performance this aforementioned night, and the real reflection of how utterly shit we were was that the crowd were so absorbed in making one giant Mexican wave around the stadium that we missed one of the only two tries that happened in the game (it was Fiji's, as if you had to ask). Oh and a fight broke out in the stand next to us and it was ever so entertaining. Watching other people's punchups took our eyes off the game for quite a while but I think secretly everyone was thankful for some actual fighting spirit in the absence of any on the pitch. Miraculously Wales won, although fairly only by one point. Maybe they let us win because they sensed how pathetic we really are. Oh and one other thing, I almost never appreciate being Welsh more than when I'm at a Wales game in the stadium. All those streaks of red clothing and Welsh flags and those naff but fantastic rugby songs like Tom Jones's Delilah and Men of Harlech, bloody amazing. And I defy any Welshman not to get a tingle down his spine when listening to the Welsh anthem being sung by a crowd of 70,000. Fucking fanfuckingtastic. Never fails to make me the most happiest and proudest person in the world. There's a lot to be said for this being Welsh naff.

Rhys and I went out afterwards on a politically incorrectly named pub crawl which I can't explain the origins of for you because it makes me seem like such a bitch, and this is my blog so buggered if I'm going to write it (haha). Huw you've played it with us once so you'll know it. But what it boils down to is being vveeerrryy careful and observant and moving in record time from pub to pub notching up as many locations as you can. And we did ourselves proud I think. I remember the Burger King pigout afterwards but Rhys informs me there was some action with chocolate biscuits and ice cream at his afterwards but I think I'm so in denial my mind stubbornly won't register it.

Myself and Rhys would like to publish our as-yet-unwritten but highly anticipated lifestyle book, The Life of Pie. Hey, I'd read it.

Back to London tomorrow.
x x x x

Some more thoughts

2005-11-08T15:20:00.000Z

I talked about it with people and I realised it's not as bad as I thought and it's actually rather good.
I don't do depressed.
x x x

Last night I drank White Lightning and I enjoyed it.

Some thoughts

2005-11-07T17:20:00.000Z

I charitably walked the dogs today and some questions came to me,

have I now become that which I loathed, one half of a naff couple unable to spend any time away from each other?
how did this happen (I've always thought I was quite fortunate not to have the obsessive gene)?
are those friendship glitches I noticed with two people now fully repaired? because it feels sort of that way but I can never tell and I don't have the sense to just talk to them
what if this all was different? how different?
would I be more fun if I was single?
how would my friends answer that last question?

I actually hope they don't read this but I just needed to write it somewhere and get it off my mind.
x x x x

Land of my father(s)

2005-11-06T21:02:00.000Z

Smegabus delivered me safely to my destination of choice at an ungodly hour this morning and I am pleased to report I am back in Cardiff for a full and enjoyable "reading" week. I've always had a sneaking suspicion that it'd be quite kooky to have a reading week in Reading, but obviously this only works when you write it down, so my conclusion is that I'm just a complete knobhead.

Sunday dinners are so synonymously homey, being as I am in London neither inclined to make any massive effort to cook nor ever overly enthusiastic to partake in anything outside of drinking, seeing friends and working out which lectures I am by rights allowed to miss because it is my god given right to skive at least some things.

Our scabby cat is no longer as scabby as it used to be, which is an ambigious statement really because before it was absolutely terrifically scabby and now it is only minorly scabby. Every time I visit home I am mightily surprised that it still hasn't fallen off this mortal coil we call life yet, as it is by my ropey calculations at least 354* in cat years (*NB - I may have exaggerated this slightly).

Who knows what tomorrow shall bring but the kids are in school and I have no money so odds on it won't be anything exciting like rock climbing. It is more likely you'll find me rediscovering yet another good book in a terminal hour of boredom and locking myself away in my room to avoid having to do some hoovering and being that ungraspable adjective, 'constructive'. Hm.

Bye! x x x

Summerdown dry strong cider

2005-11-05T13:31:00.000Z

That fantastic headache which heralds in Saturday morning (which is technically Saturday afternoon, but we shan't split hairs) is well and truly here. I'm riding the too-much-cider-payback wave and whilst this is quite painful, I've lived through worse and come out the other side still smiling (grimacing).

Rhys's birthday was fab! We made him a massive card out of a big piece of cardboard and I thought it was ever so post modern kitsch, but Rhys will probably tell you he just has complete cheapskates for friends! We drank a bit (a lot) at Liverpool Street then went to Bar Rumba for a drum and bass night. Which was nice.

Friday, Tom and I explored our curiosity for old snes games, whose high contrast displays left us completely brain numbed and with blurry vision, but I say if it hasn't physically affected you by the end of it then you just didn't try hard enough.

Tom's sister is in town (she looks like Tom! Tom has a woman's face!) and we drank copious amounts of alcohol last night and had a good ole night in... just because we could! Summerdown is officially the way forward. My alcohol maths magic skills lead me to the result that you can purchase 20 british alcohol units for the princely sum of £3!!! That's like a whole night of jollies for under a fiver. You heard it here first!!

Today I feel like being a sloth
x x x

Happy birthday Rhys!

2005-11-03T14:55:00.000Z

Yo ho ho merry birthday! Or, happy thursday, as your ever in-denial ways shall deem it to be named.
We're going out tonight for drinks to mark the sad passing of Rhys's youth. Can't wait to see him! It will be interesting to see if I can stick to my original idea of going out and having a 'couple of quiet ones'. The concept seems so alien to me.
Last night at the Union was rather relaxed and nice, there's something so homely about drinking there, like enjoying a nightcap in the comfort of your own living room except sometimes you have to dodge piles of vomit on the floor. We got sandwiched on a sporty table which it's quite fair to say myself and Tom did not belong on - the squash club table (all Mandy's doing of course!) Mandy is like the pied piper of people, manouevring her little squash darlings from one hazardous end of the Union to another, ever smiling and social. I think Mandy would do well to be a cheesy character in an all American film like, the Girl that Everyone Loves. Heehee.
Today is Thursday, and Thursday is my magical Day Off Uni, although more and more I'm beginning to feel I should just get a job. Days doing nothing, feeling broke, are just soooo demoralising. I keep saying I'll get a job and then I do... well... jack shit. Oh dear. Watch this space!
Last night myself and two northerners fulfilled our fantasies together. Short of having an orgy or something lewd, we found a proper chip shop. A proper chip shop, ladies and gentleman, with legendary 'owt moist' (i.e curry sauce for you non Peter Kaye viewers!) To paint the scene I will tell you I've never seen three students have so many thrills over something so greasy and trivial but there you go, we knew it was a wholly overwhelming find and we won't be told otherwise! The chip shop in question is but a five minute walk from our flat, and, as any foodie who's moved to London and found themselves missing fine traditional fish and chips will tell you, a 'takeaway' in London is a kebab, Lebanese, pizza, fries, fried chicken, fried bollocks, but seldom actually factually plain good old chips.
I force myself to leave this here, lest you think me a complete fat bastard.
Adieu! x x x

November motherfucker!

2005-11-02T18:38:00.000Z

Well hellew!
First post of November! Almost something worth marking but... not quite.
Monday was Halloween (see last post!) and whilst no one would join me in needless humiliation in the name of a bygone pagan celebration, everyone did go to the pub dressed in Tom's shirts as an Army of Tom (hmm, Bjork anyone?)
Last night I went to a poker night with the Latymer Court massive at... well funnily enough.... Latymer Court! Yes, I don't play poker, but I do drink wine and I'm pleased to report in that respect that it was a very successful night indeed! Me and Tom walked home through the pissing rain and even though he was the one who left his jumper behind, I made sure that I moaned enough times about how cold it was and about how wet I was. Such a mean bitch, I am.
Today is Wednesday aka ultimate doss of the academic week aka how often can I be arsed to turn up for 2 hours of lectures? nuff said. I took Tom to his flat this evening on two premises: 1) To try to complete House of the Dead (we got to the last boss last night on our first ever attempt... now that's fucking teamwork!), and 2) to make Tom do some laundry (and it is as bad as you're thinking - no pants, no socks, no joy.)
Mandy is trying to make me go to the Union this evening and I think I may very well do, you know, show my face and all that bollocks (i.e drink some pints, an ultimately selfish venture... only kidding!) I'm loving how Mandy's captainness of squash team shenanigans virtually requires nay demands that she goes to the Union every Wednesday for 'Sports Night' (and just what exactly, I wonder, is 'sports' about a load of people enjoying cheap beer... oh wait all those wanky rugby teams playing frankly shite drinking games and singing songs the rest of us neither give a shit about or listen to. And no, I'm not impressed that you're having laddish fun. You piss me off. Grrrr)
Over extended parentheses are sooo yesterday. Get original Ceri.
Ciao ciao!! x x xx

Panic on the streets of London

2005-10-31T11:13:00.000Z

Further to my last post, I cannot concentrate on last minute cramming for my exam.

Fuck!
Gotta get through the day. Do it do it.

Monday morning blues

2005-10-31T11:01:00.000Z

Another weekend of whatever it is exactly I do over weekends (Friday night at King's, enjoyably drunk), a hungover Saturday, and soaking up that Liverpool Street atmosphere with Rhys (we saw a really fantastic Capoeira demonstration and it was rather good).
I failed to get into that Clockwork Orange film last night, opting instead to choose to sleep. I have a sneaking suspicion it's just one of those 'guy' things I should neither try to understand nor attempt to dabble in. Bastard kooky sixties sets and distorted use of language.
Today is Halloween, and tonight I want to dress up and go out for a drink. Fuck knows exactly why, by all means such childish urges should have left me long before my boobs got big, but something in the draw of seeing others dressed like knobs aswell tempts me. Although really what on earth will I wear that won't look utterly unconvincing? Bin bags are soooo 2003.
I booked my ticket home for Sunday morning and I think Elin wants to come up next weekend. In trying to think of which cultural aspect of London to show her, I hit upon the not-entirely-wise idea of alcohol and binge drinking. Shame on me.
I have two Maths tests in an hour. My mojo has deserted me like a rat on a sinking ship. That's not a bad analogy really, I can well imagine my mojo to have the finesse and style of a rabid rodent.

Oh I am talking shit.
x x x x

Looking forward to a juggy!

2005-10-28T12:56:00.000Z

It's tonight!!
Haven't really invited anyone yet as have had no battery on my phone (cheers boyfriend for hogging my charger!!) But fear ye not at the very least we have the lambrini castle girls so all will be ok.
Phew.
Stuff to post, find, sort out and all that shite. bleugh.

cez x x x x

Holland Park (not actually in Holland)

2005-10-27T17:44:00.000Z

Believe that Tuesday and Wednesday nights were spent being so utterly unpredictable and visiting pound a drink at Gardening Club then pound twenty five a pint at the Union. Tsh.

Tom's been dossing at mine for a few days now as he had unfortunately left his keys in Swansea (a cheap ploy to spend more time in my highly desirable company? Think about it). So I'm pleased to report he hasn't changed his underwear in four days. Tom, if you're reading this, I know you're wearing smelly old clothes and you need a change, a wash and a shave hahahaha (actually just noticed the state of my armpits, oh the hypocrisy).

I spent the day in Holland Park today with Tom, being fortunate enough to have a free day on Thursday (oh how gorgeous it sounds as I mull that phrase around in my mind... freeee. daaaay. freeeee. freee daaaaay. yum!) And shock horror now I'm on campus when I don't actually need to be and I've decided to do some work. Shit the bed.

Over and out.
x x x

The friendliest bus journey I've ever been on. And then the most boring one.

2005-10-24T19:53:00.000Z

Sheeeesh I've let this gone to shit and I feel quite bad about it because I do rather enjoy writing up all my bits and bobs. Just noted that whilst in Scotland I updated near on every day whereas here I'm heading for a sterling twice a month average.

Current status: Poor, jobless, shitting it about failing the course, happy, enjoying London, keeping clubbing to a minimum, content, coupley, hungry (haven't eaten all day oops), on campus after hours (woo me!)

I'm printing off some course notes and just the trivial effort is making me feel good already. Sometimes I need to make arbitrary, if maybe empty gestures of effort to feel like I'm going somewhere with the course. River in Egypt anyone?

There's something quite unutterably fantastic about fresh-from-the-printer notes. Especially when your fingers are starting to feel like polar ice caps due to over ambitious air con in markedly already British temperature room. Maybe someone should tell them Britain is never warm and they're only bloody drying out my contact lenses thus forcing me to squint bat-like at the screen and make myself look like even more of a nutjob (crap schoolbag et al).

Stuff (for after all the my initial intention was to record permanently just that, all the wonderful and sometimes shite stuff I've been up to. But mostly wonderful this month I'm pleased to report!)

-Lambrini castle is going well. Frequent stonner sessions with Mel ('It's all about the shisha! you can't even taste the ganj!). Perplexing yet highly amusing dodgy electrics which seemingly randomly cut out half the flat's light when you tinker with the bog light switch.
-Fabric last week to see Pendulum. Considering how utterly fantastic and mashed and ravey the night was, it seems odd for me to report this as paramount but I must tell you I vomited black stuff the next morning. Veeeery peculiar. Pendulum was good aswell, and in case you were wondering, best stick around Fabric til closing at 6 so you can get the tube because the night buses are just bloody well redundant when youre not in your right mind!
-A weekend away from it all taking in wonderful Wales and that pinnacle of Catherine Zeta Jonesness, Swansea (I've misguided you... I actually went to visit Hwf). Needless to say, on the face of it, ten-pounds-all-you-can-drink may seem like a good idea, and fuck me, it actually is! Hurrah! Second installment in Ceri Colourful Vomit Week - it was blue the morning after (something to do with too many bastard alcopops I'd imagine!)
-Classic good laughs at the Union on no-longer-pound-a-pint Wednesday! (Poundtwentyfiveapint just doesn't do it for me). So nice to see loads of old mates and feel the good ole lovin of cheap booze, empty dancefloor yet lots of atmosphere. We smoked some shisha and tried a dirty protest against the cheesy music in DB's by adhering a plea for 'd&b please' to the dj booth window, although judging by the continuing barrage of Black Eyed Peas, it went unnoticed. And we were up for a right rave aswell. Mandy was playing some sort of naff drinking game with the Freshers whilst Mel and I practised two man drinking game skills (and another interesting game of our invention, drink whenever Mandy laughs. And as we came to realise, she laughs bloody loads!)

That's all folks, I'm off home! If anyone's reading this, hello, and yes we should have a Juggy next Friday!!

Ping!
x x x

I've been lazy

2005-10-13T13:50:00.000Z

And usually I love writing this. There seems to be plenty of time but never the thought of writing all the exciting (exciting? Hm) things I've been up to.

Will report more soon, probably, I think. Even though I have no intention of getting the internet anytime soon. It's just too cumbersome to sort out myself and I kind of enjoy not having it, lest I get addicted and spend hours cruising pixels and neglecting my friends and studies (yes, I said 'and studies').

Last night I went ice skating whilst drunk. Imagine seeing ice double. Soooo vast and white. And always trying to make you fall over. Only once though, mind. yeehah.

Ok enough BS for now, ciao bella
x x x

I can't even think of a bloody title for this post

2005-10-05T23:28:00.000Z

It's amazing how taxing it it trying to find an original title for every day of your life! Tonight I have elected not to be arsed at all, for some reason this week seems to evade neat pigeonholing, not for any unusually interesting reason, but because it does not feel like one whole feeling, more a series of interconnected bits and bobs that came together but they're not all the same.

Can you guess I'm drunk?
A more or less drained bottle of red wine sits faithfully to my side on the desk like a pet dog and its contents are neatly poured in a glass right in front of me, central in my line of vision, just in case it tries to escape or something (no! not my red wine! kids will do anything for that great taste of red wine.. oh yes.)

I'm not an alcoholic it's just I enjoy a good drink every now and again. And I've really gotten into red wine this year, it's like my stable. I could claim some sort of taste conouisseurism but really I must present to you the facts - £2 a bottle, 12%, not too turps-like in its palette.

Everything and nothing has been going on. I want to tell it all but I cannot recall it because all the days meld into one and it's like one long dream of good things and no real shocks to disperse the days. I want to tell it all and all I can think about are ice cubes. Long ice cubes which Mandy has in the freezer and you can stir your drink with them and also put them on people, just because you can.

A moth just flew into me. Not impressed.

I've lost my clubbing mojo and I don't know where it's gotten to. I haven't quite started burning my bra yet but I have to tell you nights in with good friends, good chat and strong booze are not only appealing but enjoyable, and even, god forbid, preferable. Quite simply I cannot be fucked to go out and dance with anyone right now, I just like staying in and taking it easy.

What has happened to me? I'm beginning to doubt my own sanity.

It's the alcohol talking, all of it and none of it.
I have to go now Tom is asking me if I am having fun and yes I am typing away to myself and emptying my head of thoughts before bed but I'm feeling antisocial like I should be somewhere else doing something else.

Night night
x x x x x
p.s I just thought of the phrase love ya longtime and I wanted to write it because it is so comically valuable for me. Crikey I'm full of shit.

over and out.

Mr Milkshake Man

2005-09-29T10:48:00.000Z

Uni, London, and everything I loved about last year and fun and games once again.#

On Tuesday night we went to the ever infamous Gardening Club and it was just as we expected (i.e not too much changed since we last went... last week.... much to our relief. You can just never tell these days!) Afterwards, Fay and I embarked upon a mini adventure. We got in a cage, we had a ride in a ravey street sweeper, a rickshaw man took us around the block, and a shopkeeper put on music for us to dance to whilst helping the shoppers choose their food. Turning Tom's room into a pot den later on probably wasn't the wisest idea, but was certainly the most satisfying, locking him out while we listened to Bob Marley in our underwear and chilled like it was a Sunday morning. His nose did not deceive him when he walked in later and guessed our heinous crime against his boudoir.

Last night Lianna cooked us a fantastic Mexican meal and we met her really cool boyfriend. It was like some sort of cheesy scene from a 'good friends good times' kind of baloney advert, but all really good nonetheless!

Oh and I saw Roger and Alex again and it was reaaaally nice to see them!

Loving London you know.

x x x x x
p.s I move into our flat on saturday!!!

QC Medium vs Tedium

2005-09-26T13:48:00.000Z

Today I received my brand spanking new King's College ID card and was pleasantly relieved to note I look as shite as I always do in ID photos, when it really matters most to look your best because you'll be attaching your pride and identification to that dodgy photo for the next couple of years. Ah, it was a pleasant discovery though because quite frankly I think I'd be shocked if it turned out nice.

We've discovered a cheap offie with an unusually comic proprieter who tells Tim and Tom they can have a tab if they leave me as insurance. Upon seeing his sly wink as he told me he'd need to 'interview' me first, I got what it was all about and I can safely assure you I won't be left anywhere for the sake of anyone's booze.

The cheap offie has brought with it an even more enthralling discovery, that of a certain QC Medium, a port-like substance of 15% proof, 2.99 a bottle proportions, and its effects are only limitedly chartered but give us grounds for great excitement. Quite simply, the drink brings about drunken manicness, dancing, hallucinations and good vibes, and is probably a lot cleaner than most of the drugs you get in London.

With QC addling all of our respective blood systems, we surprised ourselves by inventing what's transpired to be one of the funnest drunken games yet, the Yes Mime Storytelling Game.
Ingredients - 2 or more drunk students, QC Medium, album by Prog Rock afficionados Yes, bit of imagination and some floor space. Instructions - swig QC, select song, play, nominate mime artist, use changing moods of song to inspire yourself to tell a great and epic story which must be appropriately and expressively mimed by the mime artist (the more farfetched the better). What you will in effect end up with is someone acting out an amazing scene to the backdrop of epic adventure music with your pissed friends egging you on to ever more stupid actions using the guise of telling a great story. So utterly simple yet infinitely satisfying, I heartily recommended it. Also raving in the kitchen to d&b is quite good fun.

Oh I have so many things to do. I keep shirking my responsibilities in favour of QC. Oops.

Alex gets to London this evening, can't wait!
Love ya longtime x x x x

That Fresher feeling

2005-09-24T12:18:00.000Z

Not wanting to jinx an amazing thing, but quite simply I have the best feeling ever about this new Uni. It's more relaxed, more fun, more social, more me. But not as neurotic and annoying.

Today I'm off to the Fresher's Fayre thing to find myself a hobby.

I'm loving nights in with Tim and Tom drinking wine and chatting and watching stupid stuff but it's all so enjoyable and I feel like I'm right back in my perfect place again.

Time for the off
x x x x x

A Tale of Four Capitals (or, Filling in the Gaps)

2005-09-20T08:37:00.000Z

Capital #1 - Edinburgh, Scotland
Reading through the blog, I noticed I had written a lot about my time in Scotland, but not actually anything about my last couple of days, or indeed my departure. The last couple of days drew to a close in a sad and subdued way, as good things have a habit of doing in their last throes when you and everybody knows it'll all almost be over soon. I worked my last few shifts at the Dunny loving every minute, not really actually ever wanting to give up the job. Something about having a job and serving nice customers, I don't know, but I loved it. On my last night before I left, the girls and I went out for a curry. Everyone was knackered after a long shift so it was fairly low key, but great. Weird sitting at a table with a group of people I hadn't known two months before but were now reminiscing about good times we'd had together and giving me a sendoff like an old friend. I burnt my gob on a curry which I chose randomly, because I actually don't have much of a clue about curries, and as it transpired, I picked a hot one. Shite. Although burning off what I assumed to be most of the inside of my mouth, it was not bad tasting, although I now get what they mean about curry sweats. If you'd have ever told me it was possible to secrete vegetable bhuna from every pore, I'd probably have told you to sod off, but in front of God I swear I am now a believer!
Tidying up felt familiar and odd and I realise I've skipped from one temporary life to another over recent years, but still it never gets easier. I sat on the porch like a pikey and washed the dishes in a tub of hot water because the kitchen was out of action, and watched the world (i.e one car and two kids) go by (after all this was only a quiet residential road, and apparently they don't see much 'world'). On the plane home I dreamt of stars and something else I can't remember but I know it was lovely.

Capital # 2 - Prague, Czech Republic
If I told you my favourite holiday ever revolved around minge you probably wouldn't believe me, but there you go. I don't think any words I have could do this fantastic holiday justice, it was just the most perfect combination of sun, gorgeous people, lush city, cheap beer, laughs, and great conversations. I think we put the world to right more than once. Oh, and we found a reeeally cheap Czech old man pub, can't argue with 40p beer, no sir. I looked at the photos last night remembering it all and how fantastic it was and really how it could've been a dream. Tom's friends were fab and we all got on so well, I remember having misapprehensions about whether it would feel a bit 'them and us', but as it turned out, I shouldn't have worried at all, everyone was cooler than a cucumber, and we all had a shared passion for drinking and good times, and you can't beat mutual aims for bringing the group together. Drunkenly on one of the last nights, someone proposed doing the same thing all over again, and it should've been ridiculous, or might have been a pipe dream, but we all clinked our glasses, and now, even a week on and completely sober, it still rings true as the best idea ever. Tallinn 2006 it is!

Capital #3 - Cardiff, Wales
Getting back, if only for a few days, was euphoric. Feeling those good old vibes of home again and knowing that even if I go away, the great things about home will always be there when I get back. There was a social gathering round Rhys's, chips with Huw, a proper good rave at Evo with Gems and a frank conversation that needed to happen with Owens. Last night I walked back to my car under the streetlamps and surprised myself by crying a veritable river. I think I had fooled myself into thinking I didn't care and then when I realised I had almost lost it all, it occured to me that actually, I did care. A lot, aswell. I thought about myself losing her and it was almost unbearable and I know now I have to really make the effort because I didn't this year at all. Tonight I'm going to call her and tell her I love her and that I want this to work out more than anything. I'm not beside myself yet because I'm hoping she'll feel the same way. We'll see I guess.

Capital #4 - London, Engand
I'm sat at home at a desk in Bethan's room just now and we're waiting for the traffic on the m4 to sort itself out before we can drive me, and what feels like my whole life in condensed box form, to London to begin another year on the merry carousel that is Uni. Except a new one, and a new course, and hopefully, a new beginning. My stuff wasn't difficult to pack and I realised it was all neatly condensed and boxed anyway, in three ascending order sizes - A massive box I'd brought back from London at the end of last academic year, from which I'd selected stuff which was in a massive suitcase, which I'd taken to Scotland, from which I'd selected stuff which went in a small suitcase which accompanied me to Prague. There's something a bit worrying when you realised you lived for 4 months from 3 containers but also something comforting in the thought, like there's an achievement or something.

I have to go now. London awaits!!
Wish me luck, I really feel I'll need it
x x x x x x

Fannytastic!

2005-09-19T17:48:00.000Z

My god!
I don't even have five to remind myself of the blur the last couple of weeks has been. It's swishing right past me as I go and I've been wanting to write about it but access to the internet has been somewhat elusive and oh my god it's all so crazy sexy cool.
Yesterday I found a magic notebook and tonight I meet my friends for a drink in a bar in town and tomorrow I move back to London, for the forseeable future.

Scotland was lush, Prague still makes me tipsy with joy when I dream about it, and the future is gorgeous and sweet and all mine for the taking.

I'm poor but I'm glowing.

Oh, Ceri.
x x x x x

Woah, and I just found this and it sums it all up so so perfectly and I sometimes think Mandy steals the words right out of my mouth. Official Praguesters 2005 website with piccies on a link from Lambrini Castle.

Checking in

2005-09-06T17:02:00.000Z

Too much stuff!
Just to let you all know I am still alive, having a fab time of life and lovin it ba da ba ba baaa.
News to follow when I get back from Prague, I fly out tomorrow!

When will this joyous blur ever end!

x x x x x
p.s last night I pissed on 7 people's feet. Fact!

Rhys and Ceri creative dance co. ltd.

2005-08-27T15:56:00.000Z

We started at Hannah's house, with our old favourite wine-from-a-3-litre-bag, Country Manor ('o' in country optionally removable for immature giggles). We ended the night, after starting a fight in the Dunny with Baz's arrogant friend, after Hannah cried because Jim was a twat, and after eating junk food, at our place, listening to all kinds of music.

I vaguely remember singing Catatonia at the top of my lungs and dancing around with no bra on and my boobs jiggling like anything. Then me and Rhys performed what I'd like to believe was a highly expressive piece of dance art to Bjork but was in fact us rollicking around the lounge doing dramatic shapes (think Thrusk from the Fast Show's Jazz Club.... nice) haha we were so good.

My hangover is set to take on the world, headache at the time. And I'm going out tonight.... urrrgh.

x x x x

The life of pie

2005-08-26T14:29:00.000Z

We gorged on cakes and Rhys reflected this should be our book title, if indeed our lives could ever be acutely represented by a single book.
Last night, we drank. Tonight we drink.
Someone drove past and saw me in my bra changing in the middle of the street. I had to try on my new porno work tshirt!
We visited a graveyard and cathedral today and I amused myself with the conception of the idea for 'Pimp my Grave'. Watch this space!
Over and out
x x x

This just in

2005-08-25T12:07:00.000Z

From Nicola - "Meet at the Dunny tonight at 9"

Let the games begin. Heehee.
x x x x

An example of a bad special offer

2005-08-25T11:56:00.000Z

When special offers in Tescos go wrong. Today's particular natural disaster - 12 Mini Rolls for the price of 6, a giveaway at a mere 99p. With the honest intention of having something to greet Rhys with when he arrives, I excitedly snapped them up. 4 mini rolls down the line and my stomach's telling me that it was, contrary to initial appearances, not such a special special offer after all.

I have a day off and Rhys is coming this evening and we are getting drunk and I am very excited.

Was remembering, with a wry smile, Tuesday night as we congregated at the Dunny for the sleepover and a guy who doubtless should've known better sat with us 8 girls and ordered us round after round of sambucas and vodkas. I'd hate to have been his credit card after that intense battering. Sadly, his investment was in vain. We all went on and continued the party.... minus the guy. Bless him.

Quote of the (yester)day -
(putting his arm around me) "If I was twenty... actually, better make that forty, years younger..... (letting it hang there)... well, I'd jump all over you. Yum!"
- from an old, overweight, minging guy at the restaurant. Yuch.

I only do flirting with young rich guys. I'm a lady you know.

x x x x x x

Peaks and troughs.

2005-08-24T15:07:00.000Z

Someone once called me a rough diamond and I truly get it. I fantasise about polishing away the jagged edges. He doesn't know it but he makes me introspective. I want to smooth the rough edges all away and be flawless.

Today my edges are sharp enough to cut you, and tonight I cannot think straight. Tomorrow I want to strip myself down and start again and polish, polish, polish.

My head is so full of words and none of them make any sense.

Last night was the girly sleepover with all the girls from work. I stayed up til 7 chatting with someone I'd never met before and I loved every minute of it. I woke in the morning and found my fingers had been dyed orange from all the peach sourz. The state of me.

x x x x

Two texts, and an email.

2005-08-22T13:03:00.000Z

First text.
From him.

Second Text.
Unknown number - Good luck Ceri
Me - Who is this?
Unknown number - Aled
Me - Aled who? And why am I being wished good luck?

There's something oddly chilling about a good luck you didn't even know you needed. I wait on his reply.

The email.
Remember the Texan and the Canadian who waited for me after work one night to take me out for a beer?

"Dear Ceri,
I loved to meet you and had wished that I would have met up with you before. When the Summer was young instead of with just a week to go, I can understand why some people believe in fate, not me though.
I take the train to Manchester and stay for a week then fly back home to Ottawa, to start my university career.(Coincidentaly I'm in the seat that I meet you the first time pity no goodbye) Got to go now. But would love to hear about what your up to and any stuff that you'd like to share, maybe we'll meet in person again.

Russell "

He was a really nice guy. The world works in funny ways sometimes, I'm sure.
x x x x x x

That's not a single

2005-08-21T12:56:00.000Z

After a busy evening at work, we kicked back and did what girls do, and got thoroughly bollocksed. The writing was on the wall for our inevitable pissedness, with way too many free drinks being given to us at the bar and some seriously questionable shot measuring.
To say I'm embarrassed looking back and remembering singing to the bar staff at the Raisin and running round town with a piece of twig stroking people with it and inviting them to feel 'my bush' would usually make sense, however with a bit of booze, everyone's a mate, there are no blushes, and of cooourse everyone wants to feel my bush.
I remember linking arms and running down the street and it was all so giggly and funny. I keep forgetting that everyone else still has to reside here for some while, I live like I'm leaving in a week and take any opportunity to cause mayhem in the streets and make a tit out of myself. Apparently, shouting 'cunt' willy nilly at other drunken fools is just not advisable in such a small town! Sigh.
x x x x

Am wrecked off me puss by the waaaay

2005-08-20T15:44:00.000Z

So says our ever-hilarious colleague Kerri-Ann.

Edinburgh was absolutely fab. Too much to write about in any thorough detail but events were as follows...

Dressed like disco slapper (purple lipstick, mini skirt, big earrings), caught bus to Edinburgh and ate quiche on the bus, walked around the town (absolutely gorgeous btw), took in the buzz of the fringe (saw the street performers, a Scottish ceilidh band, got walked into by tourists), went to a salsa bar and drank like it was going out of fashion (salsa bar my arse, the only thing salsa about it was some half arsed mexican cladding on the wall, ah but never mind the drinks were cheap innit), visited some more bars (it starts to get hazy), found a parked up taxi blaring loud music with people dancing round it, so we joined in and grooved around a car (which transpired to be this, the most innovative show at the fringe, a mobile comedy show in a car, max capacity 7), found a guy playing some choons on a guitar and danced around him, luring all the passers by to come join us (notice how when you're in a city that's not your own, you don't give a fuck? I must've looked well nuts), found an amazing bar-in-a-basement called Nektar and got talking to the live band, and the guy let us play his bongos! (haha you'll love this, I even remembered their website address! I almost wish I'd stayed for a listen, but we had some serious choonage to attend), got ourselves to the Honeycomb (underground tunnelly kinda thing with blindingly fab d&b), danced, danced, danced, left at 5 ish, wandered the town, slept in the train station and met some interesting Italians, brekkie at Mcdonalds (tip - give porridge a miss if you're feeling slightly ropey as peculiarly vomit-like texture may make you want to barf), got 8am bus home to St Andrews, felt fucking awful from too much caffeine but definitely happy.... what a night!

Night off work

2005-08-19T15:29:00.000Z

And me and Bethan are off to Edinburgh!!
I'll drink to that (and then some)

x x x x

New direction

2005-08-18T16:20:00.000Z

As of September 19th, I will be studying Mathematics at King's College London.
Glad that's all sorted, although the real tough cookie of finding somewhere to live now presents itself. Sigh.

And I won't be able to make it to Leeds now before I go home on September the 1st because I want to spend some time with the family before I head back to London. Which is a buggery, but you can't be selfish all your life.

I miss him. I miss everyone. But I shall see them all again soon.
Have to go to work now and earn some dollar,
Love to one and all! x x x x

Clearing, clearing... cleared

2005-08-18T08:38:00.000Z

As was rightly pointed out to me, two salient points seem to above averagely convey my life right now, and those are (in no order of preference)
a) work, and
b) drinking.

At the risk of ruining the delicious denial I've forced myself into, I will report that last night, after work, Nicola picked me up and we drank lots of vodka at our house before crashing at 3 in the morning simple too tired to carry on.

Oh dear Ceri.

This morning, and the tortuous process of clearing for university entry this year consumed an entire 6 minutes 35 seconds of my life. But it was a worthwhile investment, as, pending confirmation, I more or less now have a place to study for next month. Am just waiting on a call back from them, don't want to jinx it and say any more but yes, it is a sad course, and yes, I sort of know what I'm doing, and no, I didn't think this extended prosaic rigmarole would be so stodgy.

Emotions of the day -
Love
Relief
Contentedness
Tiredness
Hungover

x x x x x

Hmm

2005-08-17T14:49:00.000Z

I feel like I don't know what exactly to write now.
Will be back in full swing v. soon, tomorrow, most likely
x x x x

Ground control to Major Ceri

2005-08-16T14:55:00.000Z

Busy busy busy and all I can think of to describe it is absoutely fabulous. Chilled, hectic, interesting, exciting, boring, lazy and fun in equal parts and probably some other more profound adjectives.

Lots of bits and bobs to report so I'm going to just chuck in mini paragraphs as I go.

Sunday night, I stayed up longer than I intended to, having some drinks with Dave and his mate Ross. I learnt that Communism is bad, common sense is more common than someone's sense and Dave's Mandarin is fucking awful. I rather enjoyed it yknow.

Yesterday, computer guy was there. And my brain deserted my mouth, and my words deserted my brain, and I was so curious my head couldn't even begin making the questions to find the answers I needed.

I pretended I hadn't seen him and left quietly, the way I'd came.

Yesterday afternoon, I received an email from cordon bleu chef in Mississippi. It was friendly and full of stuff about his job and it made a lot of sense.

Last night was a massiiiiiive night at work. Surreal aswell. A Canadian (who'd sat opposite me in the computer room and recognised me), and a Texan (whose table I'd served) sat at the bar and bonded over taking a shining to me. Now you'll excuse if you think I'm getting a big head over these things, or if it seems that I talk about a lot of interested men at work, but as me and Katie ruminated today, the Dunvegan is like some warp from the world of reality. A place where everyone is gorgeous and all the guys feel the need to compliment you, just because you are so utterly lush. I know, but if you don't take my word for it, come in and see what I mean! Anyway the two guys bought me a drink and insisted on taking me out for a beer after work, but as I pointed out, nothing is open in St A's late on a weeknight, so we chatted outside for a bit. They were so funny, they had nicknames for me and were arguing comically over who should be allowed to walk me home and both claiming I should let them take me out because they'd waited for me all night just to see me! I felt like some doofy tart in an American cheese film, although I'm still stumped as to why this attention is directed at me, I'm nothing especially special really.

We swapped email addresses and they've both said they'll come back this evening, although who knows. Ooh, last night frozen custard guy, Mark, came back to the restaurant. I got told off for talking with him and not doing my job heehee but he's such an interesting person, and I admire his penchant for drinking straight up triple vodkas and not giving a shit.

Will keep you posted! I've got a weird feeling that frozen custard guy might have gone home to Kansas city today, I really hope not!

Over and out
x x x x

The computer room guy

2005-08-14T19:19:00.000Z

I always see him when I'm here using the computers and we catch other's gaze and I'm wondering how long it'll be before we start a conversation.

If we start a conversation at all.

I saw him today when we went and got coffee and Hannah said he smiled my way except I was too busy looking embarrassed and mumbling at the floor and then we were gone and I was moving forward with the people on the street in the other direction and he was waiting for his coffee still and I wonder whether he was smiling at me or just smiling because that's what handsome people do all the time isn't it?

He's not here now but I almost wish he was. He looks like an Adam and his eyes look like chocolate.

I'm more intrigued than attracted.
x x x x x x

Playboy Mansions... sort of

2005-08-14T17:20:00.000Z

Yesterday, I felt I was being initiated into something truly exciting as the intricacies of the Dunvegan booze run were explained to me at work. Being the newbie, although a much liked one, apparently put me in good stead as the candidate of choice for a sneaking-out-the-back-down-to-tescos-for-vodka-and-wine maneuvre. So, summing up the necessary courage to commit the dastardly deed right under the nose of the boss, for the good of the clan, I went for it. Hell for leather sums up my tackling of the task, but I'm pleased to report it was successful, the vodka even withstanding being chucked in the bushes outside work ala clandestine loot in some naff film.

To say we were in a rush to get out of work that night is putting it mildly. Our arses didn't touch the landing strip, and before we knew it we were in the pub and ready to go to 'big stuart's house (who the fuck is big stuart?).

Turns out he's St Andrews's answer to Hugh Heffner. 38, a retired bachelor with a swanky pad to match, and kind enough to welcome 5 pissed up girls into his humble abode and give them free rein of, well, pretty much anything. I thought my request for a naked dip in the bath would raise an eyebrow but not even that! Memories are hazy, but the giggles will remain for a long time. We joy-rode his Merc into town to pick up Bethan and had some teenage kicks seeing how fast we could go round corners, avoiding the po'/fuzz/pigs/coppers (choose according to taste) and flashing some gratuitous T&A out of the windows (also we discovered a good ole chorus of 'chamone' and 'check yo bad selves' don't go far amiss either). We tried to buy us some 'Gay Hunk Action' on sky tv for the night but were admittedly too numptied to work out the PIN, but discovered the tastiest late night telly treat yet - 'signing hour' coordinated across all the major music channels at three in the morning! Imagine if you will the complete joy of seeing a (sorry I'm going to hell) spacky faced deaf person in the corner of your screen signing along to Gwen's Holla Back Girl!!! (This shit [arms folded across chest in macho fashion] is bananas [create arch shape with fingers] b-a-n-a-n-a-s [spelling each letter out individually with your fingers haha]) or, if your tastes foray into the more indie bollocks, a bit of Puddle of Mudd's Blurry (and I actually promise you, you'll never see anything funnier than someone signing 'when you shoved it in my face' by smacking themselves full on in the fizzer wearing a psuedo-comic aghast panto expression hahahahaha).... (taxi for Herbert).

We breakdanced, drank his beer, raided the spirits, ate his ice cream, ordered a delivery, made prank phone calls, and eventually got freaked out by his mate whom we'd realised had been there the whole time completely silent, wide eyed and not moving, looking like the product of some crazy-ass ketamine trip. At half four ish we called a taxi and I realised ketamine man had put his number on my phone and called me from the other room, so we grabbed all our stuff, lots of big stuart's booze and made a run for it down the country road in the complete darkness, like some characters our of a horror b movie. Special K (as we affectionately named him) then appeared to come out of his trance and followed us to the door, asking us where we were going, the freaky fucker!

And then me and Bethan watched Mean Girls til 6 and couldn't really quite work out why we'd watched a film at all, but we did, and drank our contraband booze, and I drifted off into a pleasant shleeeeep.

Today, and lunch with the girls from work and Bethan and we had a good giggle over yesterday's quality adventure. Ladies what lunch indeed.

Kerriann at work gave me a note, it was from a table I served the other night and one of them was a reaaaally nice famous american chef or something, and he'd invited us out for drinks after work but I couldn't make it on that night because I finished late. He'd come looking for me last night, just after I went to Playboy Mansions. He's flying back to America tomorrow and I'm gutted, but he left an email address so I will definitely contact him. Can't believe I missed him.

Another guy I won't be missing is frozen custard man. Oh and I don't mean that in a bitchy way, I mean that he's not leaving the country yet! Him and his brothers own some frozen custard business out in Alabama, and he came in again last night while I was still there wearing a rather fetching green suit jacket. Of course, Hannah is convinced we should shag or something because he's 'not bad looking'. His brother told Hannah he thought he was flirting with me, but I don't think so really. It tickled me to see him stood outside yesterday having a smoke, because his dad was there and still doesn't know about his habit (even though the guy is somewhere in his thirties). Anyway I really like this guy, his name is Mark (oh and he has brothers called Mack, Mike and Delbert haha) and yay he's here for another week and tells me he'll be coming back at some point. I like nice customers, they're fab.

Oh and some great news, I was at the Dunvegan earlier (where I work), and I saw big stuart and all his mates and he is getting a hot tub installed in his garden because we've promised to strip off if there's one there. Don't know whether this claim is true, but I'm told work will begin next week to put in the hot tub so we shall see!

Everything is fab in St A's... I don't want to leave here at all!

Don't know what to do with the rest of my evening, think I might head down to the Dunvegan a bit later and be a bit social (oh yes, you knows it's bad when your work is your social life aswell haha)

Love you aaaaaaall
x x x x x x

I am just too suspicious

2005-08-13T15:16:00.000Z

Last night, after a condensed drinking session after big brother final (what a show), me and Beth stumbled into St Andrews's only late night venue with loud music (the local takeaway). Twas not only great to stock up on unhealthy food, but we met some interesting vaguely Irish sounding guys. They claimed to be called Justin and Tyrone, although my suspicions were aroused because they were not black and had no air of hiphop about them. I'd like to think my man-dar is fairly on most of the time. We paddled on the beach for a bit, and it was really nice to splash about in the dark, the stacked seaweed looked like major mountains under the moon.

There were some minor disagreements in the conversation, over which I now giggle -

Firstly they did not believe we were sisters, and that we'd dressed almost identically purely accidentally. So we showed them ID and the latter they had to take our word for.

Then 'Justin' and 'Tyrone' claimed to be rugby players for Ulster rugby, which I'm ashamed to say I unduly bagged them out over, chortling to myself that any man would stoop so low to attempt to pull.

Today I found this -
http://www.ulsterrugby.com/13_123.php
http://www.ulsterrugby.com/13_2655.php

Hahahahaha. Oops. They even knew Roger's mum (BBC NI newsreader).
Although they'll never read this, my apologies are indeed profuse.

I should trust men more sometimes!

Hung-to-the-over

2005-08-10T16:26:00.000Z

Christ I was fucked last night.

x x x x

Drinking all day...

2005-08-09T23:34:00.000Z

and I'm awfully drunk.

Typing each sentence is a bit of a mish.

Me and Beth want to go to a dance fest, I'm in love with our friendship, she rocks my world.

Over and out
xx x x x x x x xxx

A phonecall I never meant to make

2005-08-08T15:18:00.000Z

I Had Doubts about us.
And worst of all, I don't really know why.

Sometimes I think it could be better and he could be more something or other and I could be more bla bla bla and we could be more etc etc and then sometimes I'm amazed because it's all so amazing and I love him more than chocolate.

Today, and I'm trying to patch things up because I'm scared I've fucked it up. And the truth of it all is, I don't want to lose him at all.

Sunshine sunshine.
x x x x x

From some clubbing website

2005-08-05T15:40:00.000Z

For Rohan's face alone, this picture deserves to be preserved for years to come.

Tom and Ben look dashing too.

http://www.dontstayin.com/uk/london/the-end/2005/jun/17/photo-473942

mwah
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I love my job!

2005-08-04T23:44:00.000Z

I never thought I'd find myself expressing that sentiment!

To summarise two days in my new job that have quite frankly felt like some surreal dream, last night a millionaire lawyer took me out for cocktails after my shift had finished, and today a man I was chatting to turned out to be a porn film producer from LA.

The former was such a gentleman (bar the aspirations to play away whilst having a wife and kids, but don't worry, he did not get it), holding open doors and buying all my drinks and regaling me with his rich tales of being very rich.
The latter said I should be in one of his films, if I ever make it to LA. Haha. As if.

The people you meet working in a golf hotel are mostly all American, rich, chatty and friendly, and I love every minute of it. So many stories!
Anyway, at least this brings me one step closer to blagging a free holiday with Rhys, haha.

Goodnight to all
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